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You may find this FAQ and all future revisions at:
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GameFAQS www.gamefaqs.com
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CREDITS
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Game Genie Code Creators Club
Game Genie codes.
Nintendo Power vol 26, 32.
map of Medieval World, "CJD" terminology, Western World bait locations.
GameFAQs
for putting a FAQ bounty on it which is the sole reason this FAQ exists.
=============================================================================
CONTENTS
=============================================================================
I. FAQ History
II. Story
III. Controls
IV. Gameplay
V. Items, people, historical dude-bait list
VI. NPC Conversations
VII. Maps
VIII. Walkthrough
Medieval World
Western World
Colonial World
Modern World
Medieval World 2
Ancient World
IX. Ending
X. Secrets and Codes
XI. Frequently Asked Questions
XII. Credits
XIII. Disclaimer
=============================================================================
I. FAQ HISTORY
=============================================================================
Version 1.00 (06/28/01) [172k]
Initial release
=============================================================================
II. STORY
=============================================================================
(from the game box)
An NES game based on those two bodacious dudes of movie fame? Excellent!!
History has been all screwed up and only the San Dimas Duo can set things
straight. Awesome responsibility, man.
Ride the Power Phone Booth to six different worlds. Galactic, man. Search
for famous Historical Dudes through space and time. Most Cosmic.
Talk with the likes of Julius Caesar (he invented Caesar Salad) and Napoleon
(the short, dead dude). Send them back in time or you'll miss the Wyld
Stallyns concert -- starring you! Heavy.
It's a bodacious, mind-boggling role-playing adventure. And your only chance
to save the world and earn the respect you deserve. No way -- yes way!
A MOST EXCELLENT ROLE-PLAYING ADVENTURE!
(story according to me)
Basically, you play as either Bill or Ted and run around (aimlessly) through
6 different levels (12 worlds altogether) looking for one of 4 possible
historical "baits". After you collect them, you must search around and
around until you find the historical dude which is randomly determined each
time you play the game. Oh yeah, you'll have to dodge the crazed locals who
are out to get you. That and avoiding landing on your butt which will happen
VERY frequently.
=============================================================================
III. CONTROLS
=============================================================================
Up : move Bill/Ted up (north)
move red circle up (in Circuits of Time)
close person's message window without any further conversation
make phone booth take the top exit (circuit of time only)
accelerate horse/canoe (Medieval World only)
Down : move Bill/Ted down (south)
move red circle down (in Circuits of Time)
close person's message window without any further conversation
decelerate horse/canoe (Medieval World only)
Left : move Bill/Ted left (west)
move red circle left (Circuits of Time)
close person's message window without any further conversation
move horse/canoe left (Medieval World only)
Right : move Bill/Ted right (east)
move red circle right (Circuits of Time)
close person's message window without any further conversation
move horse/canoe right (Medieval World only)
B : use selected good stuff
reply with current message during conversations
close person's current message window with further conversation
afterwards
cancel number on numpad
A : jump
shoot phone booth from circle (Circuits of Time)
cycle through your reply messages during conversations
close person's current message window with further conversation
afterwards
select number on numpad
Select : open/close item screen
switch between phonebook/numpad
Start : open/close item screen
Up + A : access numpad from inventory screen
=============================================================================
IV. GAMEPLAY
=============================================================================
The objective in the game is to control either Bill or Ted and rescue 1 of 16
possible historical dudes in each world. There are 6 different worlds so
you'll rescue a total of 6 people...or so you think. You'll rescue 1 person
in level 1 and level 2. You rescue 2 people in levels 3 and 4. Finally, you
rescue 3 people in levels 5 and 6. Obviously, that is a total of 12 people
so you'll replay several worlds more than once.
Now to find the historical dudes, you'll search each world for 4 items called
"baits" to lure out the historical dude (ie. fortune cookie to Confucius).
Then you'll need to find the historical dude and give him/her the correct
bait. You do NOT need to find all 4 baits. Just finding the correct one
will lure out the historical dude. To find the bait/dude, you'll have to use
clues given to you by the locals.
You begin the game with a limited number of shiny coins, 8 skeleton keys, 8
pudding, 8 firecrackers, 4 highly dangerous textbooks, and 4 cassette tapes.
These items are known as "good stuff." Use them to avoid getting caught by
the locals. If you get caught, you'll be sent to jail where you'll need a
key to get out. Run out of keys and the game is over. The trick is to
collect more items from the locals so you stay alive.
Before each world can be entered, you must pass the Circuits of Time. It's
just a bunch of pipes where you must fling the phone booth across the digits
of the phone number. Then you'll enter each world. At the end of each
world, you'll need to cross the Circuits of Time again. Starting with level
3 and beyond, the last digit of the number you are dialing will be missing.
You'll need to shoot the phone booth to one of 2 pink skulls at the far right
side. The correct pink skull will change into the final digit. As you
progress farther in the game, more white skulls will be present in the
Circuits of Time which make it harder to save money.
After coming back from the Circuits of Time, you'll be treated to your
concert performance. With each world completed, Wyld Stallyns grows larger
and larger.
=============================================================================
V. ITEMS, PEOPLE, HISTORICAL DUDE-BAIT LIST
=============================================================================
People
======
Here are all the people associated with the game.
Main Characters
---------------
Bill S. Preston, Esquire
One half of the band Wyld Stallyns and one of the two heroes.
Ted Theodore Logan
Other half of the band Wyld Stallyns and the other hero.
Rufus
The most excellent shade sporting dude from the future who aids our heroes
with coins and the all important time traveling phone booth.
Rebels
The most heinous dudes who have placed history's famous people in the wrong
time periods to force our heroes to miss the concert that will launch their
careers. *Note* you NEVER once see who they are in the game.
Historical Dudes
----------------
Cleopatra (555-9509)
Ancient queen of Egypt.
Confucius (555-6362)
Ancient Chinese philosopher.
King Arthur (555-1377)
King of Camelot.
Christopher Columbus (555-1492)
Explorer who discovered America.
Paul Revere (555-0864)
Hero during the US Revolutionary War.
Jesse James (555-1849)
Outlaw during the US Gold Rush of 1849.
Al Capone (555-7734)
Notorious gangster of the 1930s.
Elvis (555-3345)
The "King" of rock & roll.
Julius Caesar (555-1234)
Emperor of Rome.
Robin Hood (555-3643)
Bandit who stole from the rich and gave to the poor.
Rembrandt (555-8862)
Famous artist.
William Shakespeare (555-2841)
Famous playwright.
George Washington (555-1776)
Hero of the US Revolutionary War.
Sitting Bull (555-5933)
Famous Indian chief.
Thomas Edison (555-9040)
Famous inventor.
Marilyn Monroe (555-1155)
Famous model/actress of the 1950-1960s.
Other Dudes
-----------
Helpful Dude (HD)
This person will stand around and do nothing. Walk up to them and you will
get either a clue or an item.
Toll Dude (TD)
This person will be moving around. Do not bump into them or you will be
charged a fee of 1 coin. If you do not have any coins, you will be sent to
jail.
Crazed Jailer Dude (CJD)
This person will charge at you with arms extended. AVOID THEM AT ALL COSTS.
You will go to jail if you touch them. Therefore, avoid or use one of the
good stuffs to get rid of them.
Items
=====
Good Stuff
----------
Cassette Tape
The music from this tape will cause all people onscreen to start dancing for
a short while. Do not touch them or you will go to jail. After the music
stops, ALL people onscreen will become CJD. Use this very carefully and as
the ultimate last resort.
Firecracker
This explosive will scare all people on screen and cause them to run away.
It will also kill any person that it explodes upon. Be careful not to touch
anyone who is running away or you'll go to jail. Use this along with pudding
the most. Can be considered a weaker version of the highly dangerous
textbook.
Highly Dangerous Textbook
This book will eliminate all people on the screen. It's pretty valuable so
use only if the CJD have trapped you. Try to use pudding or firecrackers
instead if possible.
Pudding
Throw this to cause all people on and off screen to run after the pudding.
Be careful not to use it when no CJD are on screen. Use this most often
along with the firecrackers.
Shiny Coin
Used to pay for phone calls in the Circuits of Time. Also used to pay locals
with whom you have bumped into. If you run out of coins and bump into a
local, you will be sent to jail.
Skeleton Key
Use this to get out of jail. If you run out of keys and are sent to jail,
the game is over.
Historical Dude-Bait List
=========================
Bait Correct Historical Dude
------------------------------------------------
Bag-O-Money Robin Hood
Book of Lawyer Stuff Al Capone
Compact Disc Thomas Edison
Compass Christopher Columbus
Fortune Cookie Confucius
Headstone Elvis
Holy Grail King Arthur
Lawn Chair Sitting Bull
Major Credit Card Cleopatra
Megaphone Paul Revere
Paint Roller Rembrandt
Pair of Choppers George Washington
Rose Marilyn Monroe
Salad Dressing Julius Caesar
Stage Prop William Shakespeare
Uzi Jesse James
=============================================================================
VI. NPC CONVERSATIONS
=============================================================================
Here are all the conversations and the clues that people give you in the
game. For the regular clues, I have listed the item/person that the clue
refers to. Some clues refer to an item that is near you, usually bait, but
it all depends on your location when the clue was given to you. Consult the
maps for further details on the item/clue's whereabouts. For the non-player
characters (NPC), I first list the NPC's greeting. Then I list their inquiry
message to which you can pick one of several replies. Then I list the
results of the various replies. Please note that if you get an NPC angry,
all the people outside the NPC's house will become crazed jailor dudes.
In addition, I have made a quick flow chart of the NPC conversations. For
example:
This chart means that you start at 00. That is the person's initial greeting
message to you. Then you'll have several choices of responses to choose
from. In this case, we have 3 choices, a, b, and c. I've labeled a to be
the first response that you get to choose from and so on. Note that the game
assigns numbers to each of the message replies that you choose from. I've
changed them from numbers to letters so as to lessen the confusion from
reading "12" as "twelve" instead of the correct "one two". Therefore, I
found it easier to remember if you use "ab" instead of "12." Again, I
emphasize that there are no actual letters for each response to choose from
in the game itself. I merely assigned them letters for ease of reference.
See the full messages below each chart for more detail.
Anyway, if we pick a as the response, the NPC will reply with message 01
(again, I have assigned it according to the order they appear). Then you
will have to choose from 2 different responses aa or ab. As you can see,
I've merely prefixed the letter a before aa and ab so as to let you know that
you picked a first from the 3 previous choices. Continuing with our example,
if I pick b after picking a from the previous 3 choices, then I'll get
response 03 as a result of selecting ab. In other words, I picked the first
reply choice of 3 possible in the first round followed by the 2nd one of 2
possible in the second round. I've labeled the final responses with their
respective results.
Medieval World - regular clues
==============================
refers to clue
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
bait Check the rock at the end of the river.
bait Look for something strange by a tree near the stable.
bait Look for something strange at the last fence.
firecracker There are magic powder sticks in a corral near the
crossroads.
historical dude ___ has taken refuge in the lord's castle.
historical dude ___ is around here somewhere.
historical dude I last saw ___ heading east.
historical dude I last saw ___ heading north.
historical dude I last saw ___ heading south.
historical dude I last saw ___ heading west.
historical dude You will find ___ in a house in the village.
pudding There are sweets hidden near Miss Fifi's house.
pudding You can always find something at the four rocks.
nothing Don't you have some homework you should be doing?
nothing Get away from me kid, you're bothering me.
nothing Hey look out! Watch where you're going buddy!
nothing I don't know you! You have obviously mistaken me for
someone else.
(random) There's something strange nearby.
(random) I've heard something strange can be found back east.
(random) I've heard something strange can be found down south.
(random) I've heard something strange can be found out west.
(random) I've heard something strange can be found up north.
textbook Peasants hide strange objects in a corral near the
crossroads.
Medieval World - NPC conversation
=================================
Jester's Bar and Grill's Bartender
Knight
Miss Fifi
Peasant Babe
Ted (or Bill)
Town Crier
Jester's Bar and Grill's Bartender
----------------------------------
quick chart (see below for the exact quote)
Your replies
(a) Well, my good medieval dude, some friendly advice would suffice.
(b) A frosty root beer would be most excellent!
(c) I am faced with a most heinous problem if I order your excellent fare,
my good dude.
(aa) Where might I find the most legendary ___?
(ab) How might I fend off the most highly aggressive peasants?
(ac) Do you know where the local bodacious babes hang out?
(ba) What's grub, my good royal dude?
(bb) Bogus! I think I'll take my business elsewhere, you most ugly peasantly
dude!
(bc) Well, grog sounds safe enough, my good peasantly dude.
(ca) I must first collect the monies owed to me by ___ if I am to pay thee!
(cb) I have no coinage to spare, but would gladly consume on credit, my
beneficent host.
(cc) I am afraid that I have left my ID card at home in San Dimas.
Bartender's replies
(00) Welcome to the Jester's Bar and Grill, laddie. What kin I git fer ya?
(01) That would depend on what advice ye seek.
(02) You think that ___ would show up in a dump like this? Be gone... And
do be careful on your way out.
(03) Oh, you mean my patrons? I think that some of my friends would like to
speak with ye outside... Good luck!
(04) Have ye been to Miss Fifi's yet? That's where I go.
(05) Look, stranger, we only serve two things here, grog and grub!
(06) Last week's grog! Now get out... And if you must be so obnoxious, then
I have a suggestion...
(07) What did you call me?! I think that some of my friends would like to
speak with ye outside... Good luck!
(08) Safe enough! Why nobody's died of my grog in at least a week! I think
that some of my friends would like to speak with ye outside... Good
luck!
(09) And what would that problem be, Master Ted?
(10) Well, be that yer only problem?
(11) What?! No money?! I think that some of my friends would like to speak
with ye outside... Good friends would like to speak with ye outside...
Good luck!
(12) No ID, no grog, dude. The law is the law.
Knight
------
quick chart (see below for the exact quote)
Your replies
(a) If you're a knight, dude, where is your most shiny tin suit?
(b) My most mighty knightly dude, I come from Nottingham, which shall fall
without your help.
(c) Dude, the stench in here is most rank. Haven't you ever heard of soap?
(aa) Please, most mighty knightly dude, spare my lowly life and I will not
bother thee again.
(ab) I think that I have entered the wrong house. I am most sorry to disturb
you. Party on, dude!
(ac) Listen up, dude. I am the Mighty Wizard Ted of San Dimas. Show me to
___ before I turn thee into a most lowly toad.
(ba) If you could accompany me in my quest for ___, Sherwood Forest could
perhaps be saved.
(bb) If you could help me to kidnap the princesses from the royal ugly dudes,
I am sure that things would improve!
(bc) Dude, we could certainly use some fine weapons with which to thwart the
enemy.
Knight's replies
(00) Halt! Who enters me home! Does't thou not know I am the most feared
knight in the kingdom?!
(01) Know that I need not mine armor to slay a minor annoyance such as thee!
What service do you seek... Speak quickly.
(02) I would hate to dull my sword on the likes of you. Be gone... And do
be careful on thy way out.
(03) Forgive me, most excellent one. I did not recognize thee in this light.
(04) How may I assist thy fairest of shires?
(05) Alas, I would like to help, but if thou hast been through our streets,
then thou knowest that we, too, are plagued with violence and unrest...
And do be careful on thy way out.
(06) The royal ugly dudes to whom you refer, sir, are my brothers. I suggest
that you go take your chances in our streets.
(07)
(08) Insolent worm! Get out of my home before I reduce thee to scraps of
flesh... And do be careful on thy way out.
Miss Fifi
---------
quick chart (see below for the exact quote)
Your replies
(a) What?! No way, Miss Fifi. You see my luck hasn't been so good lately.
(b) Greetings, Miss Fifi, I am Ted of San Dimas, and I am on a most highly
specific quest.
(c) Whoa, How did I get here again?
(aa) I am Ted of San Dimas, and I come in search of ___.
(ab) Excuse me Miss Fifi, but I think I'd better be going.
(ac) I don't know.
(ba) Well, actually, I must find ___ before my time here runs out.
(bb) Fame, fortune, and a highly excellent video, Miss Fifi!
(baa) The fuzz? No way, Miss Fifi.
(bab) Oh sure, Miss Fifi, do I look like a cop?
(ca) No way, Miss Fifi. I told you, I'm saving my money for an Iron Maiden
CD.
(cb) Bogus! I knew I forgot something!
(cc) Oh, that's right. Now I remember you.
Miss Fifi's replies
(00) Velcome, handsome, to Miss Fifi's Saloon and Bingo Parlor! Ve have zee
finest games of chance gathered from all parts of zee continent. And
zo, handsome, vitch game would you like to play?
(01) Vell zen, vat are you doing here at Miss Fifi's?
(02) Vell zen, be gone. I do not need any more intrigue here... And do be
careful on your way out.
(03) Au revoir, Monsieur Ted. And do return ven you have more time and
money.
(04) Vell, maybe this will improve your luck.
(05) Ah, yes, many of my visitors are desperately searching for something
special. Vat do you seek, handsome?
(06) And vat do you vant with ___? Are you vith zee police?
(07) Vell, officer, since your boys do not bother my business, I suppose that
I could offer you some help. .
(08) Ah, Monsieur Ted, how very nice to see you again! Did you remember to
bring your wallet with you this time?
(09) Vell, zen do not come back to my house again, Monsieur Ted... And do be
careful on your vay out.
(10) Vell, ven you get it, do come back and play at Miss Fifi's.
(11) Get out of my house now, before I summon zee captain of the guard from
zee gaming room... And do be careful on zee way out.
Peasant Babe
------------
quick chart (see below for the exact quote)
Your replies
(a) Whoa, are you a medieval peasant babe?
(b) Whoa babe, mellow out. Tis merely Ted of San Dimas, lost in this most
medieval of worlds.
(c) At home, my excellent babe, I am known as the most eligible bachelor in
San Dimas.
(aa) Greetings, bodacious peasant babe, I am Ted of San Dimas!
(ab) Greetings, I am Ted of San Dimas. I mean no harm but have merely lost
my way.
(ac) What's a bodacious babe such as yourself doing in such a most backwards
place as this?
(aca) Well, to be frank, the tumultuous tenants of this fine shire could
behave more hospitably.
(acb) With babes like you, what's not to like fair maiden?
(acc) Whoa, you a most triumphant vision.
(ba) Accompany me to the San Dimas High Prom, where we will have a most
triumphant time?
(bb) Perhaps you have seen ___ passing this way?
(bc) How about your number, my most excellent vision of medieval beauty?
Peasant's replies
(00) Help! Who spies on me?
(01) And who wants to know?
(02) I'm sorry, but if I talk to a stranger, my father will have the man
killed... And do be careful on thy way out.
(03) Oh, come on Master Ted, do thee think that I was born yesterday? That
line is more stale than thy breath... And do be careful on thy way out.
(04) This shire does not please thee, Master Ted?
(05) Perhaps this will help.
(06) You had better hope that my husband, the ogre, has not overheard you.
He's very jealous... And do be careful on thy way out.
(07) And what do ye wish of me, a peasant maiden, Master Ted?
(08) In fact, I have just seen ___. Now please leave me in
peace.
Ted
---
quick chart (see below for the exact quote)
Your replies
(a) Whoa, Ted, what am I doing here?
(b) Whoa, it's me! No way!
(c) Hey, Ted, this is most excellent. Party on, self!
(ba) The most elusive ___?
(bb) The answers for the upcoming history exam?
(bc) Could you lend me a few dollars? I'll pay you back!
(ca) Well, Ted, I am having a most difficult time finding ___.
(cb) I could really use a few hints for this most perilous game!
(cc) The local dudes have been most unfriendly.
Ted's replies
(00) Whoa, Ted, what am I doing here?
(01) If you don't know, then I certainly don't, dude.
(02) Yes way, Ted. What do you seek here in this most medieval of worlds?
(03) Wake up Ted! If you don't know where ___ is, then how do you expect me
to know?... And do be careful on your way out, dude.
(04) Wrong adventure, dude... Keep your mind on your current problems.
(05) No, but I can give you a tip...
(06) Yes, my most excellent self, this is most triumphant. Can I be of any
help?
(07) Is that all? No problem, dude.
(08) Well, dude, if you could figure out which questions to ask, then perhaps
you would be more successful.
(09) Well you'll just have to be more careful, now won't you?
Town Crier
----------
quick chart (see below for the exact quote)
Your replies
(a) Hey, mellow out dude. The door was open.
(b) Hey dude, there's no reason to get all weepy, no matter how non-
triumphant times may seem.
(c) I am Ted of San Dimas, and I have traveled long and far in search of
___.
(aa) I am Ted of San Dimas, and I have come in search of ___.
(ab) Well, excuse me for asking! Ciao, dude!
(ac) I thought that perhaps I could find shelter here from the most
acrimonious locals.
(ba) You said you're the town's crier, right?
(bb) I don't know dude, what are you talking about?
(bc) Listen dude, I need a place to hide from the most highly antagonistic
local dudes.
(ca) Dude... The world... It's like round.
(cb) If you chew a Wintergreen Mint in the dark, you get these excellent
sparks in your mouth.
(cc) The walrus was Paul?!
Town Crier's replies
(00) What are ye doing in my chambers?! Even the town crier deserves some
privacy!
(01) Insolent youth, what do ye want of me?
(02) I am the town crier, not the town snitch. Perhaps ___ does not wish to
be found by you, stranger.
(03) Those locals are my friends. If they are after you, then I am sure they
have good reason. Perhaps a trip to the jailer will straighten all of
this out, yes?
(04) What are you talking about?
(05) You are even more ignorant than I had imagined. Perhaps a trip to the
gallows will wise ye up... And be careful on thy way out.
(06) Well, my son, I can not offer you shelter, but perhaps I can impart a
piece of valuable information...
(07) Ah, you have traveled from lands afar? Perhaps we can swap information.
I deal in news from afar. What gossip can you offer me in return for
news of ___?
(08) What kind of fool do ye take me for? Get out before I have thee thrown
out... And do be careful on your way out.
(09) Every idiot knows that! Get out before I have you thrown out... And do
be careful on your way out.
(10) Now that is a exactly the sort of tidbit that the townsfolk around here
enjoy. I suppose that I do owe you something of value for that.
Western World - regular clues
=============================
refers to clue
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
bait Look for something strange in an indian teepee.
bait Something strange can be found near a crossroad.
bait Something strange is hidden near the sheriff's office.
historical dude ___ is around here somewhere.
historical dude ___ is in a house with a horse trough.
historical dude I believe ___ is in a house facing south.
historical dude I last saw ___ heading north.
historical dude I last saw ___ near a crossroad.
nothing Don't you have some homework you should be doing?
nothing Get away from me kid, you're bothering me.
nothing Hey, look out! Watch where you're going buddy!
nothing I don't know you! You have obviously mistaken me for
someone else.
pudding You can always find something at the four rocks.
textbook Watch for the 3 threes.
?? Traders bury valuables near fences.
?? There's an indian back east who might help you.
?? Something strange is buried by the first fence.
?? I've heard something strange can be found down south.
?? I've heard something strange can be found out west.
?? There's something strange nearby.
Western World - NPC conversation
================================
Bill (or Ted)
Card Dealer
Cowboy
Marshal
Mexican
Trader Dan
Bill
----
quick chart (see below for the exact quote)
Your replies
(a) Whoa, Bill, what am I doing here?
(b) Excellent, dude! What are you doing here?!
(c) Whoa, how do I know that you're not the most evil android version of my
excellent self?
(aa) Well, Bill, I am having a most difficult time finding ___.
(ab) Where's the action, dude?!
(ac) The local vandals are causing me to have a most heinous time here.
(ca) Okay, if you're me, in the future, then where was ___ when you were me
here?
(cb) Okay, what is Missy's favorite number?
(cc) Okay, if you're me in the future, do I ever win this game?
Bill's replies
(00) Whoa, Bill, what am I doing here?
(01) I suspect, my most excellent self, that I need some assistance here in
this most wild of western worlds.
(02) Duh, Bill, if you don't know where he is, then how do you expect me to
know?
(03) Have you tried Miss Fifi's? But don't waste all your change on the
arcade machines, dude.
(04)
(05) Playing Bill and Ted's Excellent Video Game Adventure II - The Sequel.
Sorry that I don't have time to help you.
(06) Why don't you test me?
(07) Most simple, my good man.
(08) Shut up Bill!
(09) Do you really think that this stupid character can answer that question
for you?
Card Dealer
-----------
quick chart (see below for the exact quote)
Your replies
(a) Cards? Excellent. I must warn you that I am the San Dimas King of
Hearts.
(b) Dude, a game of cards would be most excellent, but I am on a most
vital quest. I must find ___.
(c) Cards?! Most triumphant. Can you change a quarter?
(aa) Radical dude! Deal away.
(ab) Stud? Excellent! That's me, dude!
(ac) I would love to play, but I am on a most important quest to find ___.
(aaa) Hey dude, even I know that gambling is most uncool.
(aab) What?
(aaaa) Hey dude, there's no need for violence. I know when to leave.
(aaab) Mend your ways, dude. You're too uptight.
(ba) I have come from the future to bring news of a most excellent concert.
(bb) I bear most triumphant news from San Dimas.
(ca) Okay cow-dude, I can take a hint.
(cb) You don't have to get all beastly.
(cc) I detect a note of sarcasm so I shall depart, cow-dude.
Card Dealer's replies
(00) Hey pardner, can I interest you in a little game of cards?
(01) Have a seat, sucker, uh, friend. How's about a friendly hand of stud?
(02) Have a seat and throw your money onto the table.
(03) Maybe you'd prefer a little showdown?
(04) What do you think this is, a kiddie game? Why don't you just show
yourself out, and be careful out there. This can be a tough town.
(05)
(06) What do you want with ___ and what makes you think that ___ will want to
see you?
(07) The future, huh kid? I don't think that I wanna play cards with someone
as plum loco as you. Maybe you'd just better go.
(08) San Dimas? Another Mexican spy, eh? I think you'd better vamoose
before the deputy catches up with you.
(09) Why don't you go get your momma and come back to play tomorrow.
(10) A hint? How about this...
Cowboy
------
quick chart (see below for the exact quote)
Your replies
(a) Excellent. Someone who speaks English.
(b) Greetings, cow-dude. I am Bill from San Dimas. I come in search of
___.
(aa) Oh, you're a cow-dude. No offense, cow-dude, but my sophistication
seems to confuse your fellow cow-folks.
(aaa) Thanks.
(aab) Mister cow-dude, I didn't mean to offend. My most humble apologies.
(aac) I know.
(ba) Sticks and stones may break my bones, cow-dude, but names will never
hurt me.
(bb) Hey, there's no reason to use discouraging words, Mister cow-dude!
(bc) Hey, Mister cow-dude, I think I'd better go now!
(baa) Look, dude, it's Halley's Comet!
(bab) Nothing, Mister cow-dude.
(bac) The rain in Spain falls mainly on the plains?
Cowboy's replies
(00) Where do you think you're going, dude?
(01) The only one talking funny around here seems to be you, dude.
(02) Sophisti-who? Dude, where do you get off talking funny about the folks
round here? Seems to me you're the only horse of a different color that
I've seen lately.
(03) Dude, I think you'd better get going before I get angry... And be
careful on your way out.
(04) Well, you seem like a good enough dude. If you're having that much
trouble, then I have a suggestion for you.
(05) And what business does the likes of you have with ___, pip squeak?
(06) What did you say, lil' squirt?
(07) That's better kid. I'll be seeing you.
(08) Ah, a cowboy poet! I think I can help you.
(09) I think that's a good idea.
Marshal
-------
quick chart (see below for the exact quote)
Your replies
(a) Dude, the way that we have treated Native Americans is most non-
triumphant!
(b) Excellent, dude! Cowboys and Indians?! Count me in!
(aa) Dude, remember the golden rule - be excellent to each other.
(ab) Dude, violence never pays.
(ac) I just do not think that we should treate Native Americans in this most
bogus way.
(ba) Before I can enlist, good captainly dude, I must find ___!
(bb) Look dude, the way that I've been treated around here, I have little
interest in fighting to defend these people.
(bc) I'd love to sign up, but ___ has my pen.
Marshal's replies
(00) Excellent! Another recruit for Fort Ticonderoga?! We need you to help
fight off these Indians.
(01) What are you saying, boy? Are you some sort of Indian lover?
(02) A pacifist, eh? Well maybe a night in the stockade will help you to see
things differently.
(03) Native Americans? Boy, that's exactly who we are protecting, Americans!
Maybe a night in the stockade will help you to think about this.
(04) Well, just sign here, sonny, and you'll be elevated immediately to the
rank of Private in our fine army!
(05) But of course, Private, right after you enlist we can talk about a
leave... In a year or two.
(06) The locals have been giving you trouble? May I make a suggestion?
(07) Well if you promise to come back right away, I'll let you in on a little
secret.
Mexican
-------
quick chart (see below for the exact quote)
Your replies
(a) Hey amigo-dude, no way will I part with the excellent threads.
(b) Burritos? Excellent, amigo-dude! I am most hungry.
(c) Tell me where ___ is and I will bring you many highly excellent things
from the Galeria.
(ba) Donkeys? Don't make me laugh, amigo-dude.
(bb) Sorry dude, but I have an excellent mountain bike at home.
(bc) Come off it senor Mexican dude! What would I do with donkeys?
(ca) Well, I'm sure it was an accident.
(cb) ___ must be executed for the most heinous of crimes.
Mexican's replies
(00) Hey senor, I like your shirt very much. Maybe you will trade it for my
two burros?
(01) Perhaps you will prefer to trade after a night in the local jail, si?
(02) No burritos these, senor. these are full grown burros. You may get
many meals from these fine animals.
(03) Perhaps you will not laugh so hard after a night in the local jail, si?
(04) Have it your way, senor, but others may not be so generous. Good
luck... And be careful on the way out.
(05) Perhaps I could offer you something else. Perhaps you would be
interested in this - Most excellent news, amigo-dude.
I'll bring you a shirt from the Galeria!
(06) You seek ___? So do I, senor. ___ killed my brother.
(07) So I take it you are a friend? You had better go before I just shoot
your lights out and take the shirt... And be careful on the way out.
(08)
Trader Dan
----------
quick chart (see below for the exact quote)
Your replies
(a) Trader Dan, I am Bill of San Dimas and I have traveled far in search of
___.
(b) Your guns are very fine indeed, Mister Dan, but I cannot use them to
help me to vanquish the most angry locals.
(c) Trader Dan?! Haven't our paths converged before?
(aa) Trader Dan, I don't think that you understand.
(ab) Frater-what?
(ac) Trader Dan, if I am unable to find ___, then I will have no use for
this fine firearm.
(aaa) Listen dude, I have neither the money nor the inclination to buy this
most magnificent musket.
(aab) Dan, dude, can we talk? If I can find ___, I will have the money to
buy an even bigger gun, maybe even a cannon.
(ba) Gee, Trader Dan, will you accept my dad's charge card?
(bb) But I am unable to garner wages while being pursued by these most
combative dudez.
(bc) Trader Dan, I shall ignore that request and leave. And remember the
first golden rule - Be excellent to each other.
(ca) No way dude, didn't you try to sell me a broken down chariot in Ancient
World?!
(cb) No way dude, didn't you try to sell me an Edsel in Modern World?!
(cc) No way, I know. You tried to sell me some broken down old horse in
Colonial World!
Trader Dan's replies
(00) You say you need a gun? Friend, you've come to the right place. Trader
Dan is the name, large guns and ammo the game.
(01) Well, son, ___ is surrounded by security like any celebrity. The only
way you can fraternize with ___ is with an invitation... Or with
massive firepower.
(02) Of course I do. I know, you're worried that you won't be able to pay
for such an impressive piece. Don't worry. Lease it.
(03) No money down? Maybe I'd better show you something else... Like the
door... And do be careful on your way out.
(04) Well, well, well, why didn't you just come out and say so?
Come back soon now, ya hear?
(05) You know, consort, mingle, mix, socialize, hobnob. I've obviously
misjudged you... And do be careful on your way out.
(06) Wait a minute, kid. Yer looking to kill ___ with a pistol purchased in
my little emporium? Maybe you'd better leave now... And do be careful
on yer way out.
(07) Having trouble with the locals, eh? Well, for a price, perhaps your old
friend Dan can to help you.
(08) Credit?! I don't even know you! Get out of my store now.
(09) Money? Now you're talking my language, kid. And
remember, it was Trader Dan who told you. Come back soon now, ya hear?
(10) Why sure, kid, didn't we serve side by side, shoulder to shoulder, at
the Alamo?
(11) I don't know what you're talking about kid. Now get out of here before
I call the cops.
Colonial World - regular clues
==============================
refers to clue
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
bait Something strange can be found near a crossroad.
bait Something strange is in a south bush in the northwest.
bait There's something strange between the rock and the bush.
firecracker Minutemen hide munitions south of town.
historical dude ___ is around here somewhere.
historical dude ___ is in a brick house
historical dude I last saw ___ heading north.
historical dude I last saw ___ near a crossroad.
nothing Don't you have some homework you should be doing?
nothing Get away from me kid, you're bothering me.
nothing Hey, look out! Watch where you're going buddy!
nothing I don't know you! You have obviously mistaken me for
someone else.
pudding The colonists store belongings in two-rock corrals.
pudding You can always find something at the four rocks.
random There's something strange nearby.
tape Check around the double fence.
?? I've heard something strange can be found out west.
Colonial World - NPC conversation
=================================
Green Minuteman
Metalsmith's Son
Miss Fifi
Tax Collector
Ted (or Bill)
Trader Dan
Green Minuteman
---------------
quick chart (see below for the exact quote)
Your replies
(a) I just seek shelter from the most ornery locals, my good minute-manly
dude!
(b) Greetings muskadude. I am Ted of San Dimas, and I seek ___.
(c) Listen dude, I am growing most weary of the locals' hostility in this
game.
(aa) You mean Prince? His music jams but he's not the most masculine guy, if
you know what I mean.
(ab) Hey dude, this is America, land of the free!
(ac) The king? He's alright, but I wouldn't lend him any of my records.
Know what I mean?
(ba) I bring news from a most bodacious babe abroad!
(bb) I bear urgent news of the enemy?
Green Minuteman's replies
(00) Halt! Where do ye think that ye are going?
(01) And are ye friend or foe of His Majesty?
(02) I think that ye know not where ye are. Perhaps it would be best if ye
left by the way ye entered... And do be careful on your way out.
(03) Ah, so you are one of us. If ye seek to thwart the redcoats and
royalists, know this...
(04) And what do you want with ___? Are ye friend of foe?
(05) Ah, from England? Perhaps it would be best if ye left by the way ye
entered... And do be careful on your way out.
(06) Well, why didn't you say so?
Metalsmith's son
----------------
quick chart (see below for the exact quote)
Your replies
(a) Sure dude, what can I do to help you in your most bogus plight?
(b) Sorry dude, but I have no time for kid's play.
(c) That bell looks pretty bad, dude.
(aa) Gee dude, I don't really know a lot about bells.
(ab) Well, dude, why don't you just turn it around?
(ac) Dude, that bell is spent. I'd make for the hills before you dad gets
home.
(ca) No problem, dude. Use bubble gum. It worked great when I fixed the
antenna on the phone booth.
(cb) Sorry dude, but, in my humble opinion, you're terminated.
(cc) Let me offer some advice, little dude. Blame it on somebody else...
Like your sister.
Metalsmith's son's replies
(00) Sir, I beg you. Please help me before my father the Metal Smith comes
back to see what I have done.
(01) Well, I was cleaning the town bell for my father when, well, I seemed to
have cracked it.
(02) Oh no. I hear my father coming. You'd better go... And be ye careful
on your way out.
(03) Of course! You have saved me from untold suffering. Let me do
something for you.
(04) Please! I will do anything for you. My father will kill me if he sees
this.
(05) A million thanks, Master Ted. Allow me to help you now.
Miss Fifi
---------
quick chart (see below for the exact quote)
Your replies
(a) Greetings, Miss Fifi. I am Ted of San Dimas.
(b) Bonjour, Miss Fifi. I am Ted of San Dimas, and I have come long and far
in search of ___.
(c) Miss Fifi, I would love to find ___ here in your fine saloon.
(aa) Well, a little arcade action would be most welcome. Could you loan me a
quarter?
(ab) Gee, Miss Fifi, I would love to play your games, but I have to retrieve
the money that I loaned to ___ first.
(ac) Miss Fifi, do you take Visa?
(ba) Well, it seems like I've seen everybody entering or leaving your most
excellent rumpus room.
(bb) To tell the truth, Miss Fifi, it was just a guess.
(bc) Well, actually, I was running from the petulant natives when I found
your open door.
Miss Fifi's replies
(00) Velcome, my handsome young man, to Miss Fifi's Saloon and Bingo Parlor.
We offer zee finest in gaming pleasures right here in zee colonies.
(01) Vell, Mister Ted, zat is very nice, but vat is it zat I can do for you
on zis fine afternoon?
(02) Vat, you vant to go to play for free? Get out of here before I sick zee
colonial guard on you... And do be careful on your way out.
(03) Vell, Now ven you get zee money, be sure to return to Miss
Fifi. Our tables will be waiting for you.
(04) Vat do you mean?! You vant to see my visa?! Even zee governor plays
here regularly. Now leave my place... And do be careful on your way
out.
(05) And vat makes you think zat you can find ___ here, Monsieur Ted? Are
you with zee police?
(06) Zo, you have been watching Miss Fifi's, eh? I think zat perhaps you
should get out of here, before I sick zee colonial guard on you.. And
do be careful on your way out.
(07) Vell, I guess zat you should perhaps get out of here, before I sick zee
colonial guard on you... And do be careful on your way out.
(08) Vell, my poor thing, vy didn't you tell Miss Fifi or this sooner?
(09) Meester Ted, I am afraid zat ve have not seen your friend here. Perhaps
you should talk to Monsieur Dan, down zee street.
Tax Collector
-------------
quick chart (see below for the exact quote)
Your replies
(a) I don't have any taxes records, dude, but I'd love to check them out.
(b) Hey dude, I'm underage and I don't have a job. Sue me!
(c) My good money grubbing dude, I come representing the king on a most holy
quest.
(aa) Dude, I come from San Dimas of the excellent USA. I pay taxes to no
king. I pay Uncle Sam!
(ab) What are you talking about?!
(ac) Whoa, you're an English dude, aren't you? Do you know Jimmy Page?
(ca) His royalness seeks the whereabouts of that scoundrel, ___.
(cb) His royal kingliness requests that you cease and desist with this most
bogus taxation.
(cc) H. M. has sent me in search of arms with which his troops may battle the
rabble!
Tax Collector's replies
(00) Welcome, m'lad. I trust that ye have brought yer receipts and tax
records with you.
(01) What are you talking about, you idiot? In my office, thou pays thy
taxes to the king. I hope that thou hast come prepared!
(02) A rebel, are we? Perhaps you will see things differently after a stay
at ye olde jailhouse.
(03) An agent of the king? Why didn't ye make that clear! In what way may I
assist His Highness?
(04) But of course. ___ is the scourge of the monarchy.
(05) Imposter. Perhaps you will see things differently after a stay at ye
olde jailhouse.
(06)
Ted
---
quick chart (see below for the exact quote)
Your replies
(a) Whoa, Ted, what am I doing here?
(b) Excellent! I love when this happens! Greetings Ted!
(c) Whoa, how do I know that you're not the most evil android version of my
excellent self?
(aa) Well, Ted, I am having a most difficult time finding ___.
(ab) I could really use a good cheat for this game.
(ac) The local dudes are most pugnacious. What should I do?
(ba) If you're me, then why don't you tell me?
(bb) I don't know.
(bc) Could you lend me a little dinero?
(ca) Okay, what did I do to thwart the local vandals?
(cb) What happened to me and Bill in our excellent sequel?
(cc) What number am I thinking of?
Ted's replies
(00) Whoa, Ted, what am I doing here?
(01) I suspect, my most excellent self, that I need some information! How
can I help me?
(02) Duh, Ted, if you don't know where he is, then how do you expect me to
know? (nothing)
(03) Sorry, dude, but I am far too busy playing Bill and Ted's Excellent
Video Game Adventure II - The Sequel. Good luck, dude!
(04) Avoid them?! ... Did you really expect the game to be that easy?
(05) Greetings, my excellent self. What do I seek here in this most
triumphant of video games?
(06) Alright, smarty. You seek ___.
(07) Ah, Ted, when will I ever learn?! Oh well, keep trying self.
(08) No way, dude. How many times do I have to tell myself! Never a
borrower or a lender be!
(09) Go ahead, ask me about anything that we know.
(10) Easy dude!
(11) The answer to that question will be 7 dollars, please, payable at your
local theater.
(12) Didn't you already ask me that?
Trader Dan
----------
quick chart (see below for the exact quote)
Your replies
(a) Trader Dan, I am Ted of San Dimas and I have traveled far in search of
___.
(b) Your horse is very fine indeed, Mister Dan, but I am afraid that it
will not help me vanquish the most angry locals.
(c) Trader Dan?! Haven't our paths converged before?
(aa) Trader Dan, I don't think that you understand.
(ab) Frater-what?
(ac) Trader Dan, if I am unable to find ___, then I will have no use for
this fine creature.
(aaa) Listen dude, I have neither the money nor the inclination to buy this
most withered beast.
(aab) Dan, dude, can we talk? If I can find ___, I will have the money to
buy a horse of even higher breeding... And cost.
(ba) Gee, Trader Dan, will you accept my dad's charge card?
(bb) But I am unable to garner wages while being pursued by these most
combative dudez.
(bc) Trader Dan, I shall ignore that request and leave. And remember the
first golden rule - be excellent to each other.
(ca) No way dude, didn't you try to sell me a broken down chariot in Ancient
World?!
(cb) No way dude, didn't you try to sell me an Edsel in Modern World?!
(cc) No way dude, didn't you try to sell me some bogus pistol in Western
World?!
Trader Dan's replies
(00) You say you need a horse? Friend, you've come to the right place.
Trader Dan's the name, horses the game. And just what can I get for you
today?
(01) You say you want to fraternize with the rich and famous? Have I got the
horse for you. Just step right this way.
(02) Of course I do. I know, you're worried that you won't be able to pay
for such a handsome animal. Don't worry. Lease it.
(03) No money down? Maybe I'd better show you something else... Like the
door... And do be careful on your way out.
(04) Well, well, well, why didn't you just come out and say so?
Come back soon now, ya hear?
(05) You know, consort, mingle, mix, socialize, hobnob. I've obviously
misjudged you... And do be careful on your way out.
(06) Having trouble with the locals, eh? Well, for a price, perhaps your old
friend Dan can to help you.
(07) Credit?! I don't even know you! Get out of my store now.
(08) Money? Now you're talking my language, kid. And
remember, it was Trader Dan who told you. Come back soon now, ya hear?
(09) Why sure, kid, didn't we serve side by side, shoulder to shoulder, at
Valley Forge?
(10) I don't know what you're talking about kid. Now get out of here before
I call the cops.
Modern World - regular clues
============================
refers to clue
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
bait Look for something strange by a fence in the village.
bait Look for something strange by a rock near the curb.
historical dude I last saw ___ heading west.
pudding Check around the double fence.
pudding You can always find something at the four rocks.
nothing Don't you have some homework you should be doing?
nothing Get away from me kid, you're bothering me.
nothing Hey look out! Watch where you're going buddy!
nothing I don't know you! You have obviously mistaken me for
someone else.
?? Bums hide food near fire plugs.
?? I've heard something strange can be found down south.
?? I've heard something strange can be found out west.
?? Something strange can be found near a crossroad.
?? There's a storage place north of the river.
Modern World - NPC conversation
===============================
Big Al's Speakeasy's Bouncer
Gangster
Miss Fifi
Ted (or Bill)
Trader Dan
US Marine Recruiter
Big Al's Speakeasy's Bouncer
----------------------------
quick chart (see below for the exact quote)
Your replies
(a) I am Ted of San Dimas and have traveled far to find this fine
establishment.
(b) I merely seek refuge from the most bellicose local dudez.
(c) I am most weary from my quest and seek a short respite inside!
(aa) I merely seek refuge from the most bellicose local dudez!
(ab) But dude, I have come far through time and space to find ___.
(ba) Perhaps you could facilitate my safe passage through the local streets?
(bb) Your belligerent attitude is most unbecoming!
(bc) My most bogus host, I shall depart. Even I know when I am not wanted.
(ca) I want my MTV?
(cb) Cowabunga?
(cc) Whoa, I know this one! Swordfish!
(cca) Leave my arms? What?
(ccb) Excellent, my most estimable host!
Bouncer's replies
(00) Where do you think you're going, Junior? You have business here?
(01) Listen, sonny, this ain't the sort of place for a kid like you. Why
don't you take a long walk?
(02) Well, you ain't gonna find no refuge here kid. Why don't you just head
on out by the way you came in? ... And do be careful on your way out.
(03) ___? Why didn't ya say so, sonny? Why don't you step back outside and
talk to the boys? They'll be able to tell you something, I'm sure.
(04) Listen kid, we don't need no trouble here. Why don't you just go out by
the way you came in?
(05)
(06) I'll see you out in the street, punk.
(07) Well, why didn't you just say so? ... Of course you know the password.
(08) Welcome to Big Al's Speakeasy, home of the famous Mickey Finn. Please
check any arms with the coat check girl and enjoy your stay.
Gangster
--------
quick chart (see below for the exact quote)
Your replies
(a) Dude, I mean no harm. The door was ajar and I sought refuge from the
most hostile locals.
(b) There is no need for that firearm, dude. I am Ted of San Dimas, and I
come in peace.
(c) The boss sent me.
(aa) Excellent! I've been carrying these around for years.
(ab) No way dude! Everybody knows that the tooth fairy is a most bodacious
babe!
(ac) No sir, not with that gun in your hand.
(ca) He wants to know where the weapons are! He thought you might know...
If you want to stay alive.
(cb) He said you're a dead man, dude!
(caa) And why should I believe an outlaw dude such as yourself?
(cab) Listen dude, we know that you know the whereabouts of ___, so start
singing... Or else.
(cac) You know where the weapons are so talk now or prepare to meet your
maker.
Gangster's replies
(00) How the heck did you get in here?
(01) And who do I look like, the Good Tooth Fairy?
(02) Just get out of here, punk, before I decide to use this gun... And do
be careful on your way out.
(03) If you don't want to go in a blaze of gunfire, you'd better turn around
right now and leave by the way you came in.
(04) Well why didn't you say so? What does the boss want?
(05) Look, I told him everything I know. You gotta believe me.
(06) Because I've got the gun? Now get out of here before I stop feeling so
friendly.
(07) Alright, alright, just don't hurt me.
(08) Thanks for the tip kid. I think I'll let you live.
Miss Fifi
---------
quick chart (see below for the exact quote)
Your replies
(a) Miss Fifi, I am on a most highly specific quest.
(b) If you could answer a couple of questions, I would be most grateful,
Miss Fifi.
(c) I would love to play a game with a babe as excellent as yourself Miss
Fifi, but...
(d) Whoa! Miss Fifi?! Haven't I been here before?!
(aa) Miss Fifi, I am Ted of San Dimas, and I have traveled far through space
and time in search of ___.
(ab) Everywhere I go, the indigenous dudez seem intent upon incarcerating me
in a most violent manner.
(ba) No way, frenchy-babe.
(bb) But of course, my little french fry.
(ca) But I need to find ___ before it is too late.
(cb) But I cannot rest until I get the locals to stop harassing me.
(cc) But I'm not in the position to risk my meager assets.
Miss Fifi's replies
(00) Welcome to Miss Fifi's, mon cherie, zee finest gaming house zis side of
Vegas. Vat can I do for you, handsome?
(01) Specific? Do not be shy, young man. We have games for all types here.
Vat is it that you seek?
(02) Miss Fifi does not cater to people as strange as you, Monsieur. I
suggest that you leave... And do be careful on your way out.
(03) You mean zay vant to arrest you? Zee police? Ve don't need trouble
here, Monsieur Ted... And do be careful on your way out.
(04) Are you with zee police?
(05) Zen be gone before I call zem. ___ comes to play here from time to
time, but zat is none of your business... And do be careful on your way
out.
(06) Vell, any friend of zee deputy's is a friend of mine, I suppose, but
pleaze do not tell ___ who told you this.
(07) But?
(08) You would rather find ___ zen spend a leetle time with me? You pig!
Get out of my house now! ... And do be careful on your way out.
(09) No money?! Get out and don't come back, you mealy little worm.
(10) Excuse me. Why don't you talk to the doorman outside... And do be
careful on your way out.
* The game messed up when I used this response. Can anyone confirm this?
Ted
---
quick chart (see below for the exact quote)
Your replies
(a) Whoa, Ted, what am I doing here?
(b) Excellent! I love when this happens! Greetings Ted!
(c) Whoa, how do I know that you're not the most evil android version of my
excellent self?
(aa) Well, Ted, I am having a most difficult time finding ___.
(ab) I could really use a good cheat for this game.
(ac) The local dudes are most pugnacious. What should I do?
(ba) If you're me, then why don't you tell me?
(bb) I don't know.
(bc) Could you lend me a little dinero?
(ca) Okay, what did I do to thwart the local vandals?
(cb) What happened to me and Bill in our excellent sequel?
(cc) What number am I thinking of?
Ted's replies
(00) Whoa, Ted, what am I doing here?
(01) I suspect, my most excellent self, that I need some information! How
can I help me?
(02) Duh, Ted, if you don't know where he is, then how do you expect me to
know? (nothing)
(03) Sorry, dude, but I am far too busy playing Bill and Ted's Excellent
Video Game Adventure II - The Sequel. Good luck, dude!
(04) Avoid them?! ... Did you really expect the game to be that easy?
(05) Greetings, my excellent self. What do I seek here in this most
triumphant of video games?
(06) Alright, smarty. You seek ___.
(07) Ah, Ted, when will I ever learn?! Oh well, keep trying self.
(08) No way, dude. How many times do I have to tell myself! Never a
borrower or a lender be!
(09) Go ahead, ask me about anything that we know.
(10) Easy dude!
(11) The answer to that question will be 7 dollars, please, payable at your
local theater.
(12) Didn't you already ask me that?
Trader Dan
----------
quick chart (see below for the exact quote)
Your replies
(a) Trader Dan, I am Ted of San Dimas and I have traveled far in search of
___.
(b) Your Edsel is very fine indeed, Mister Dan, but I am afraid that it
will not help me vanquish the most angry locals.
(c) Trader Dan?! Haven't our paths converged before?
(aa) Trader Dan, I don't think that you understand.
(ab) Frater-what?
(ac) Trader Dan, if I am unable to find ___, then I will have no use for
this fine vehicle.
(aaa) Listen dude, I have neither the money nor the inclination to buy these
most questionable wheels.
(aab) Dan, dude, can we talk? If I can find ___, I will have the money to
buy an even more costly vehicle.
(aac) But Mister Dan, dude, I don't even have a license with which to operate
this fine vehicle.
(ba) Gee, Trader Dan, will you accept my dad's charge card?
(bb) But I am unable to garner wages while being pursued by these most
combative dudez.
(bc) Trader Dan, I shall ignore that request and leave. And remember the
first golden rule - be excellent to each other.
(ca) No way dude, didn't you try to sell me some broken down old horse in
Colonial World!
(cb) No way dude, didn't you try to sell me a broken down chariot in Ancient
World?!
(cc) No way dude, didn't you try to sell me some bogus pistol in Western
World?!
Trader Dan's replies
(00) You need a chariot? Something snazzy? New? Used? Friend, you've come
to the right place. Trader Dan's the name, fine automobiles the game.
(01) Listen sonny, if you want to fraternize with the rich and famous, you
have got to have the right wheels. Follow me.
(02) Of course I do. I know, you're worried that you won't be able to pay
for such a flashy vehicle. Don't worry. Lease it.
(03) No money down? Maybe I'd better show you something else... Like the
door... And do be careful on your way out.
(04) Well, ___ happens to be a close personal friend of mine, so give ___ my
regards and come back when you're ready to buy.
(05) Listen, kid, why don't you come back when you're ready to buy. In the
meantime, don't bother me... And do be careful on your way out.
(06) You know, consort, mingle, mix, socialize, hobnob. I've obviously
misjudged you... And do be careful on your way out.
(07) Well, well, well, why didn't you just come out and say so?
Come back soon now, ya hear?
(08) Having trouble with the locals, eh? Well, for a price, perhaps your old
friend Dan can to help you.
(09) Credit?! I don't even know you! Get out of my store now.
(10) Money? Now you're talking my language, kid. And
remember, it was Trader Dan who told you. Come back soon now, ya hear?
(11) Why sure, kid, didn't we serve side by side, shoulder to shoulder, at
Angio?
(12) I don't know what you're talking about kid. Now get out of here before
I call the cops.
US Marine Recruiter
-------------------
quick chart (see below for the exact quote)
Your replies
(a) Excellent! The proud! The few! I finally get a chance to serve Uncle
Sam!
(b) Dude, I would love to serve my country, but first I must complete my
quest.
(c) No way, dude. You must put your guns down and be excellent to each
other.
(aa) But what about my quest for ___?
(ab) Excellent, now I'll be able to overpower those nasty locals!
(ac) Whoa! Wait until I tell Bill about this!
(ba) To find ___ here in Modern World, my most militaristic dude?
(bb) Commander Ted, of the CIA, dude. I seek ___, suspected subversive.
(bc) I don't know. The most raging guitar solo on Freebird?
(ca) Danke schon, dude!
(cb) Dude, read your history books! Even I know that we're going to win the
war!
(cc) Dude, I'm having enough trouble with the pugnacious local dudes!
Recruiter's replies
(00) Welcome to the U.S. Marine Recruitment Center son! How long a hitch can
I sign you up for?
(01) That's right boy! Just sign right here and you'll soon be wearing the
most prestigious uniform in the world.
(02) Sorry, private, but that's all a thing of the past now... Or maybe
you'd prefer a trip to the stockade?
(03) I'm afraid you won't be seeing those dudes for awhile private. In fact,
you'll be seeing only Fort Bragg for the next 17 years or so... Or
maybe you'd prefer a trip to the stockade?
(04) I'm afraid you won't be seeing Bill for awhile private. In fact, you'll
be seeing Fort Bragg exclusively for the next 17 years or so... Or
maybe you'd prefer a trip to the stockade?
(05) And what could be more important than serving your country, soldier?
(06) Well, perhaps a stay in the stockade will revive your sense of
patriotism!
(07) Well, commander, why didn't you say so. I do have some intelligence
info on ___.
(08) Good answer, private. You may exit safely, and good luck on your quest.
(09) What?! And run in the face of global ruin?! Do you want to be speaking
German kid?
(10) Well, they are no problem, if you know what to use to fight them off.
Medieval World 2 - regular clues
================================
refers to clue
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
bait Check the rock at the end of the river.
bait Look for something strange by a tree near the stable.
bait Look for something strange at the last fence.
firecracker There are magic powder sticks in a corral near the
crossroads.
historical dude ___ has taken refuge in the lord's castle.
historical dude ___ is around here somewhere.
historical dude I last saw ___ heading east.
historical dude I last saw ___ heading north.
historical dude I last saw ___ heading south.
historical dude I last saw ___ heading west.
historical dude You will find ___ in a house in the village.
pudding There are sweets hidden near Miss Fifi's house.
pudding You can always find something at the four rocks.
nothing Don't you have some homework you should be doing?
nothing Get away from me kid, you're bothering me.
nothing Hey look out! Watch where you're going buddy!
nothing I don't know you! You have obviously mistaken me for
someone else.
(random) There's something strange nearby.
(random) I've heard something strange can be found back east.
(random) I've heard something strange can be found down south.
(random) I've heard something strange can be found out west.
(random) I've heard something strange can be found up north.
textbook Peasants hide strange objects in a corral near the
crossroads.
Medieval World 2 - NPC conversation
===================================
Jester's Bar and Grill's Bartender
Knight
Miss Fifi
Peasant Babe
Ted (or Bill)
Town Crier
Jester's Bar and Grill's Bartender
----------------------------------
quick chart (see below for the exact quote)
Your replies
(a) Well, my good medieval dude, some friendly advice would suffice.
(b) A frosty root beer would be most excellent!
(c) I am faced with a most heinous problem if I order your excellent fare,
my good dude.
(aa) Where might I find the most legendary ___?
(ab) How might I fend off the most highly aggressive peasants?
(ac) Do you know where the local bodacious babes hang out?
(ba) What's grub, my good royal dude?
(bb) Bogus! I think I'll take my business elsewhere, you most ugly peasantly
dude!
(bc) Well, grog sounds safe enough, my good peasantly dude.
(ca) I must first collect the monies owed to me by ___ if I am to pay thee!
(cb) I have no coinage to spare, but would gladly consume on credit, my
beneficent host.
(cc) I am afraid that I have left my ID card at home in San Dimas.
Bartender's replies
(00) Welcome to the Jester's Bar and Grill, laddie. What kin I git fer ya?
(01) That would depend on what advice ye seek.
(02) You think that ___ would show up in a dump like this? Be gone... And
do be careful on your way out.
(03) Oh, you mean my patrons? I think that some of my friends would like to
speak with ye outside... Good luck!
(04) Have ye been to Miss Fifi's yet? That's where I go.
(05) Look, stranger, we only serve two things here, grog and grub!
(06) Last week's grog! Now get out... And if you must be so obnoxious, then
I have a suggestion...
(07) What did you call me?! I think that some of my friends would like to
speak with ye outside... Good luck!
(08) Safe enough! Why nobody's died of my grog in at least a week! I think
that some of my friends would like to speak with ye outside... Good
luck!
(09) And what would that problem be, Master Ted?
(10) Well, be that yer only problem?
(11) What?! No money?! I think that some of my friends would like to speak
with ye outside... Good friends would like to speak with ye outside...
Good luck!
(12) No ID, no grog, dude. The law is the law.
Knight
------
quick chart (see below for the exact quote)
Your replies
(a) If you're a knight, dude, where is your most shiny tin suit?
(b) My most mighty knightly dude, I come from Nottingham, which shall fall
without your help.
(c) Dude, the stench in here is most rank. Haven't you ever heard of soap?
(aa) Please, most mighty knightly dude, spare my lowly life and I will not
bother thee again.
(ab) I think that I have entered the wrong house. I am most sorry to disturb
you. Party on, dude!
(ac) Listen up, dude. I am the Mighty Wizard Ted of San Dimas. Show me to
___ before I turn thee into a most lowly toad.
(ba) If you could accompany me in my quest for ___, Sherwood Forest could
perhaps be saved.
(bb) If you could help me to kidnap the princesses from the royal ugly dudes,
I am sure that things would improve!
(bc) Dude, we could certainly use some fine weapons with which to thwart the
enemy.
Knight's replies
(00) Halt! Who enters me home! Does't thou not know I am the most feared
knight in the kingdom?!
(01) Know that I need not mine armor to slay a minor annoyance such as thee!
What service do you seek... Speak quickly.
(02) I would hate to dull my sword on the likes of you. Be gone... And do
be careful on thy way out.
(03) Forgive me, most excellent one. I did not recognize thee in this light.
(04) How may I assist thy fairest of shires?
(05) Alas, I would like to help, but if thou hast been through our streets,
then thou knowest that we, too, are plagued with violence and unrest...
And do be careful on thy way out.
(06) The royal ugly dudes to whom you refer, sir, are my brothers. I suggest
that you go take your chances in our streets.
(07)
(08) Insolent worm! Get out of my home before I reduce thee to scraps of
flesh... And do be careful on thy way out.
Miss Fifi
---------
quick chart (see below for the exact quote)
Your replies
(a) What?! No way, Miss Fifi. You see my luck hasn't been so good lately.
(b) Greetings, Miss Fifi, I am Ted of San Dimas, and I am on a most highly
specific quest.
(c) Whoa, How did I get here again?
(aa) I am Ted of San Dimas, and I come in search of ___.
(ab) Excuse me Miss Fifi, but I think I'd better be going.
(ac) I don't know.
(ba) Well, actually, I must find ___ before my time here runs out.
(bb) Fame, fortune, and a highly excellent video, Miss Fifi!
(baa) The fuzz? No way, Miss Fifi.
(bab) Oh sure, Miss Fifi, do I look like a cop?
(ca) No way, Miss Fifi. I told you, I'm saving my money for an Iron Maiden
CD.
(cb) Bogus! I knew I forgot something!
(cc) Oh, that's right. Now I remember you.
Miss Fifi's replies
(00) Velcome, handsome, to Miss Fifi's Saloon and Bingo Parlor! Ve have zee
finest games of chance gathered from all parts of zee continent. And
zo, handsome, vitch game would you like to play?
(01) Vell zen, vat are you doing here at Miss Fifi's?
(02) Vell zen, be gone. I do not need any more intrigue here... And do be
careful on your way out.
(03) Au revoir, Monsieur Ted. And do return ven you have more time and
money.
(04) Vell, maybe this will improve your luck.
(05) Ah, yes, many of my visitors are desperately searching for something
special. Vat do you seek, handsome?
(06) And vat do you vant with ___? Are you vith zee police?
(07) Vell, officer, since your boys do not bother my business, I suppose that
I could offer you some help. .
(08) Ah, Monsieur Ted, how very nice to see you again! Did you remember to
bring your wallet with you this time?
(09) Vell, zen do not come back to my house again, Monsieur Ted... And do be
careful on your vay out.
(10) Vell, ven you get it, do come back and play at Miss Fifi's.
(11) Get out of my house now, before I summon zee captain of the guard from
zee gaming room... And do be careful on zee way out.
Peasant Babe
------------
quick chart (see below for the exact quote)
Your replies
(a) Whoa, are you a medieval peasant babe?
(b) Whoa babe, mellow out. Tis merely Ted of San Dimas, lost in this most
medieval of worlds.
(c) At home, my excellent babe, I am known as the most eligible bachelor in
San Dimas.
(aa) Greetings, bodacious peasant babe, I am Ted of San Dimas!
(ab) Greetings, I am Ted of San Dimas. I mean no harm but have merely lost
my way.
(ac) What's a bodacious babe such as yourself doing in such a most backwards
place as this?
(aca) Well, to be frank, the tumultuous tenants of this fine shire could
behave more hospitably.
(acb) With babes like you, what's not to like fair maiden?
(acc) Whoa, you a most triumphant vision.
(ba) Accompany me to the San Dimas High Prom, where we will have a most
triumphant time?
(bb) Perhaps you have seen ___ passing this way?
(bc) How about your number, my most excellent vision of medieval beauty?
Peasant's replies
(00) Help! Who spies on me?
(01) And who wants to know?
(02) I'm sorry, but if I talk to a stranger, my father will have the man
killed... And do be careful on thy way out.
(03) Oh, come on Master Ted, do thee think that I was born yesterday? That
line is more stale than thy breath... And do be careful on thy way out.
(04) This shire does not please thee, Master Ted?
(05) Perhaps this will help.
(06) You had better hope that my husband, the ogre, has not overheard you.
He's very jealous... And do be careful on thy way out.
(07) And what do ye wish of me, a peasant maiden, Master Ted?
(08) In fact, I have just seen ___. Now please leave me in
peace.
Ted
---
quick chart (see below for the exact quote)
Your replies
(a) Whoa, Ted, what am I doing here?
(b) Whoa, it's me! No way!
(c) Hey, Ted, this is most excellent. Party on, self!
(ba) The most elusive ___?
(bb) The answers for the upcoming history exam?
(bc) Could you lend me a few dollars? I'll pay you back!
(ca) Well, Ted, I am having a most difficult time finding ___.
(cb) I could really use a few hints for this most perilous game!
(cc) The local dudes have been most unfriendly.
Ted's replies
(00) Whoa, Ted, what am I doing here?
(01) If you don't know, then I certainly don't, dude.
(02) Yes way, Ted. What do you seek here in this most medieval of worlds?
(03) Wake up Ted! If you don't know where ___ is, then how do you expect me
to know?... And do be careful on your way out, dude.
(04) Wrong adventure, dude... Keep your mind on your current problems.
(05) No, but I can give you a tip...
(06) Yes, my most excellent self, this is most triumphant. Can I be of any
help?
(07) Is that all? No problem, dude.
(08) Well, dude, if you could figure out which questions to ask, then perhaps
you would be more successful.
(09) Well you'll just have to be more careful, now won't you?
Town Crier
----------
quick chart (see below for the exact quote)
Your replies
(a) Hey, mellow out dude. The door was open.
(b) Hey dude, there's no reason to get all weepy, no matter how non-
triumphant times may seem.
(c) I am Ted of San Dimas, and I have traveled long and far in search of
___.
(aa) I am Ted of San Dimas, and I have come in search of ___.
(ab) Well, excuse me for asking! Ciao, dude!
(ac) I thought that perhaps I could find shelter here from the most
acrimonious locals.
(ba) You said you're the town's crier, right?
(bb) I don't know dude, what are you talking about?
(bc) Listen dude, I need a place to hide from the most highly antagonistic
local dudes.
(ca) Dude... The world... It's like round.
(cb) If you chew a Wintergreen Mint in the dark, you get these excellent
sparks in your mouth.
(cc) The walrus was Paul?!
Town Crier's replies
(00) What are ye doing in my chambers?! Even the town crier deserves some
privacy!
(01) Insolent youth, what do ye want of me?
(02) I am the town crier, not the town snitch. Perhaps ___ does not wish to
be found by you, stranger.
(03) Those locals are my friends. If they are after you, then I am sure they
have good reason. Perhaps a trip to the jailer will straighten all of
this out, yes?
(04) What are you talking about?
(05) You are even more ignorant than I had imagined. Perhaps a trip to the
gallows will wise ye up... And be careful on thy way out.
(06) Well, my son, I can not offer you shelter, but perhaps I can impart a
piece of valuable information...
(07) Ah, you have traveled from lands afar? Perhaps we can swap information.
I deal in news from afar. What gossip can you offer me in return for
news of ___?
(08) What kind of fool do ye take me for? Get out before I have thee thrown
out... And do be careful on your way out.
(09) Every idiot knows that! Get out before I have you thrown out... And do
be careful on your way out.
(10) Now that is a exactly the sort of tidbit that the townsfolk around here
enjoy. I suppose that I do owe you something of value for that.
Ancient World - regular clues
=============================
refers to clue
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
bait Check the bush for something strange, east of the temple.
bait Look for something strange in a tree west of the palace.
firecracker The natives practice magic in a corral up north.
firecracker You can always find something at the four rocks.
nothing Don't you have some homework you should be doing?
nothing Get away from me kid, you're bothering me.
nothing Hey look out! Watch where you're going buddy!
nothing I don't know you! You have obviously mistaken me for
someone else.
pudding Travelers leave food as an offering at the temple.
skeleton key There's a magic tree near a circle to the south.
?? I've heard something strange can be found up north.
Ancient World - NPC conversation
================================
Army Recruiter
Bill (or Ted)
Egyptian Musician
Gladiator
Oracle of Delphi
Trader Dan
Army Recruiter
--------------
quick chart (see below for the exact quote)
Your replies
(a) What?! No way, dude, the ways of the warrior are in total opposition to
my way of life.
(b) Dude, I would welcome the adventure, but first I must complete my quest!
(c) Dude, I will only lay down my life for the good old red, white and blue!
(aa) Listen, dude, your karma is most rotten!
(ab) Gee nice Mister Tough Dude, there is no need for violence. I'll just
show myself out.
(ac) I can't say that it's at the top of my list, dude.
(ba) I have come far in search of ___.
(bb) I seek something with which to battle the most violent natives!
(bc) Just about anything, dude!
(ca) The free coffee and doughnuts?
(cb) Whoa, dude, I want to be all that I can be!
(cc) Whoa, I don't know dude. No way do I wish to be here!
Recruiter's replies
(00) Ahoy little man. You have come to join the Emporer's army?
(01) You don't approve of conquest?! What kind of wimp are you?!
(02) Get out of here before I slice you to bits, you dipweed!
(03) Get out of here, coward. We don't need any girly men in this outfit!
... And do be careful on your way out.
(04) And what could be more important than doing the Emporer's bidding?
(05) Well,
(06) Insolent commoner! It's off to the gallows with you!
(07) And what brings a foreign traitor like you to this recruitment center?!
(08) Excellent! Sign here and you can report for duty immediately... at the
stockade, traitor!
(09) Well then, why don't you leave by the way you came.
Bill
----
quick chart (see below for the exact quote)
Your replies
(a) Whoa, Bill, what am I doing here?
(b) Excellent! I love when this happens! Greetings Bill!
(c) Whoa, how do I know that you're not the most evil android version of my
excellent self?
(aa) Well, Bill, I am having a most difficult time finding ___.
(ab) I could really use a good cheat for this game.
(ac) The local dudes are most pugnacious. What should I do?
(ba) If you're me, then why don't you tell me?
(bb) I don't know.
(bc) Could you lend me a little dinero?
(ca) Okay, what did I do to thwart the local vandals?
(cb) What happened to me and Ted in our excellent sequel?
(cc) What number am I thinking of?
Bill's replies
(00) Whoa, Bill, what am I doing here?
(01) I suspect, my most excellent self, that I need some information! How
can I help me?
(02) Duh, Bill, if you don't know where he is, then how do you expect me to
know? (nothing)
(03) Sorry, dude, but I am far too busy playing Bill and Ted's Excellent
Video Game Adventure II - The Sequel. Good luck, dude!
(04) Avoid them?! ... Did you really expect the game to be that easy?
(05) Greetings, my excellent self. What do I seek here in this most
triumphant of video games?
(06) Alright, smarty. You seek ___.
(07) Ah, Bill, when will I ever learn?! Oh well, keep trying self.
(08) No way, dude. How many times do I have to tell myself! Never a
borrower or a lender be!
(09) Go ahead, ask me about anything that we know.
(10) Easy dude!
(11) The answer to that question will be 7 dollars, please, payable at your
local theater.
(12) Didn't you already ask me that?
Egyptian Musician
-----------------
quick chart (see below for the exact quote)
Your replies
(a) Greetings dude! I am Bill of Wyld Stallyns. You play most
triumphantly. Wanna jam?
(b) Awesome notes, dude. Do you know smoke on the water?
(c) Dude, I hope that's just a hobby, because you play most heinously.
(aa) Gee, I don't know that tune, but it sounds radical!
(ab) A cobra! Excellent! Can I try charming him with my musical prowess?
(aba) Well, I don't know that many songs yet, but I play a most excellent
lead.
(abb) I can play Epic by Faith No More!
(ba) The oracle dude? You know him too? Cool!
(bb) No wonder you're so upset. That oracle is one disagreeable dude.
(ca) Actually, I am looking for ___, but have had no luck as the locals are
most unaccommodating.
(cb) Actually, I am taking refuge from the most unfriendly ancient dudes.
(cc) Obviously not the non-triumphant notes that you are playing.
Musician's replies
(00) Dum dum dee dee diddle diddle dee.
(01) Beware of my snake, young one.
(02) What are you, stupid? Get out of here and let me practice... And be
careful on thy way out.
(03) What songs do you know, my youthful bard?
(04) Well, why don't you lead yourself to the door and go bother somebody
else. I must practice now... And do be careful on thy way out.
(05) Are you saying that you've lost all faith in your fellow man? I can not
stand for that! Take you negative attitude and leave my house... And
do be careful on thy way out.
(06) The sea is on fire you say? That oracle, he was right.
(07) Yes, he told me that a lad would come to me seeking ___ and that I must
tell him this...
(08) By Apollo! He told me when the seas burn, a young demon from the skies
would come to me, but that I should fear him not, because he would be
captured.
(09) Thank you son. I'll take that as a compliment. What brings you here?
(10) Well, ___ rarely attends my recitals, so why don't you just leave me
alone and let me practice... And do be careful on thy way out.
(11) I'm a not surprised with that attitude of yours. You need some help.
(12) Why don't you just go back where you come from and let me practice...
And do be careful on thy way out.
Gladiator
---------
quick chart (see below for the exact quote)
Your replies
(a) Octowho? I am Bill of San Dimas, my nearsighted friend.
(b) I come in search of ___, my most excellent gladiating dude.
(c) Careful, my fine overdeveloped friend, I am Bill of San Dimas, a most
worthy adversary.
(aa) Didn't you open for Bon Jovi?
(ab) Dude, you have got to work on that attitude of yours!
(ac) Whoa! Are you Conan?!
(ba) Dude, slavery is way uncool. What century are you living in?
(bb) I bear news from the north that ___ will most certainly wish to hear.
(bba) That is for ___'s ears only, you muscle bound pig.
(bbb) Madonna's personal telephone number?!
(bbc) I have been sent by the Greek godly dudes to take ___ to San Dimas for
a most bodacious party.
(ca) Listen up, ancient dude. I've watched American Gladiator World, and
Lace taught me everything she knows.
(cb) Perhaps I spoke rashly?
(cc) Listen up dude, Bo may know baseball, but Bill knows karate.
Gladiator's replies
(00) Where go ye, young Octavious? Know ye not how to show respect to a
gladiator of my stature?
(01) Insolent swine! Prepare to die! Do you know whom you address?
(02) Ah, you are the contact from Gaul.
(03) Be gone, pig... And do be careful on thy way out.
(04) And what business would ye have with such a mighty figure, slave boy?
(05) Prepare to die!
(06) What news could you possibly bear that ___ would be interested in?
(07) Well, the gods have certainly chosen an unlikely messenger, but
tip>
(08) You, lowly urn scum, challenge me?
(09) Be gone before I decide to spare Caesar's Republic your most annoying
existence.
(10) Perhaps we should meet outside. And do bring your friends... I'll be
bringing mine.
Oracle of Delphi
----------------
quick chart (see below for the exact quote)
Your replies
(a) Whoa, how do you know who I am?
(b) You're one of those oracle dudes, aren't you?
(c) Will Wyld Stallyns rule most triumphantly?!
(aa) Whoa, that's heavy!
(ab) No way! If you're a psychic-dude, then tell me, what number am I
thinking of?
(ac) Will David Lee Roth ever rejoin Van Halen?
(aba) Whoa, that's cool. Can you help me find ___?
(abb) Whoa, that's pretty cool, but you probably just saw my excellent movie.
(abc) Well, how about this, dude - what's black and white and red all over?
(ba) Well, as you must know, my good godly dude, I am searching for ___.
Can you be of assistance?
(bb) The local dudes act most inhospitably when I approach them. What
should I do?
(bc) Well, lay some oraclizing on me, my most psychic dude.
Oracle's replies
(00) Ah, Bill, the Great One of San Dimas, I knew that you would be coming.
Ask whatever you must, of the past, present, or future, and I will
provide the answers that you seek.
(01) I am the Oracle of Delphi. My blindness allows me to see all. Ask what
you will and I shall provide the answers that you seek.
(02) Insolent commoner! Leave this temple before I sick the Emporer's troops
on you... And be careful on your way out.
(03) 69.
(04)
(05) I see danger for you just outside the door. You had better leave now,
before the danger grows.
(06) Excellent question. When the rest of his hair falls out, the two
triumphant ones will rejoin. Goodbye great one. Be excellent to each
other and party on, dude!
(07) Yes, excellent one. Your own powers of observation are astounding. But
isn't there something that you would like to know?
(08) I see nothing at this time. Perhaps if you come back later, I can be of
assistance.
(09) I see you heading to jail. I hope that you may find a key there. That
is all.
(10) Wyld Stallyns, Wyld Stallyns...hmm...let me see. You must find ___ if
the band is to succeed. That has just become more difficult, however,
as I see you heading to jail. That is all.
Trader Dan
----------
quick chart (see below for the exact quote)
Your replies
(a) Trader Dan, I am Ted of San Dimas and I have traveled far in search of
___.
(b) Your chariots are most fine indeed, Mister Dan, but I am afraid that
they will not help me vanquish the most angry locals.
(c) Trader Dan?! Haven't our paths converged before?
(aa) Trader Dan, I don't think that you understand.
(ab) Frater-what?
(ac) Trader Dan, if I am unable to find ___, then I will have no use for
this fine vehicle.
(aaa) Listen dude, I have neither the money nor the inclination to buy these
most questionable wheels.
(aab) Dan, dude, can we talk? If I can find ___, I will have the money to
buy an even more costly chariot.
(aac) But I don't even own a beast of burden with which to pull this fine
wagon.
(ba) Gee, Trader Dan, will you accept my dad's charge card?
(bb) But I am unable to garner wages while being pursued by these most
combative dudez.
(bc) Trader Dan, I shall ignore that request and leave. And remember the
first golden rule - be excellent to each other.
(ca) No way dude, didn't you try to sell me some broken down old horse in
Colonial World!
(cb) No way dude, didn't you try to sell me a broken down chariot in Ancient
World?!
(cc) No way dude, didn't you try to sell me some bogus pistol in Western
World?!
Trader Dan's replies
(00) You say you need a chariot? Something snazzy to impress the ladies? My
boy, you've come to the right place. Trader Dan's the name, chariots
the game.
(01) Listen sonny, if you want to fraternize with the rich and famous, you
need the right wheels. I've got just the thing.
(02) Of course I do. I know, you're worried that you won't be able to pay
for such a flashy vehicle. Don't worry, with just a little money down
you can drive away today.
(03) No money down? Maybe I'd better show you something else... Like the
door... And do be careful on your way out.
(04) Well, well, well, why didn't you just come out and say so?
Come back soon now, ya hear?
(05) Listen, kid, why don't you come back when you're ready to buy. In the
meantime, don't bother me... And do be careful on your way out.
(06) You know, consort, mingle, mix, socialize, hobnob. I've obviously
misjudged you... And do be careful on your way out.
(07) Well, ___ happens to be a close personal friend of mine, so give ___ my
regards and come back when you're ready to buy.
(08) Having trouble with the locals, eh? Well, for a price, perhaps your old
friend Dan can to help you.
(09) Credit?! I don't even know you! Get out of my store now.
(10) Money? Now you're talking my language, kid. And
remember, it was Trader Dan who told you. Come back soon now, ya hear?
(11) Why sure, kid, didn't we serve side by side, shoulder to shoulder, in
Cyprus?
(12) I don't know what you're talking about kid. Now get out of here before
I call the cops.
=============================================================================
VII. MAPS
=============================================================================
Here are the maps of all 6 worlds. I've rotated the map 45 degrees counter
clockwise. Therefore, be sure to rotate it back when you use it. For
example, here is the compass directions according to my map and according to
how they are in the game. Also, the maps are only an approximation. I've
drawn the areas around the baits more clearly.
My map's compass Game map's compass
N N
| /
W - + - E W -- . -- E
| /
S S
Legend
------
* locations (each will be individually described below)
. horse area
| wall, fence
- wall, fence
= horse trough
+ intersection (aka crossroad)
B bait
C cassette tape
F firecracker
P pudding
S skeleton key
T highly dangerous textbooks
Medieval World
--------------
| A | B | C | D | E | F | G | H | I | J | K |
---+-----------------------------------------------------------------+---
| + ||_||_||*| S| + |__||__||_*| + |
| __ --B | * |
|| | | | __ B |
4 || * | | | _ _______ | 4
|| | | | |F| | | |
|| | | | | | |
||__* | | | | |
___| | | | | |___
| __ _ | | | | |
|| | |T| |__* | | |
|| | | T | |
3 ||__| | | | 3
| __ __ __ | | |
| | || || | | | |
| |__||*_||__| | | |
---| + + | T | |---
| _ | | |
|| | | | |
|| * | | |
2 ||_| __ | | | 2
|...... | | | | |
|. . | | | | |
___|. . | * | | |___
|. . | | | | |
|. . |__| | | |
|. . |_______| |
1 |...... __ __ __ | 1
| | || || | _________ |
| B |__||__||_*| | | |
| _ |*_______*| B |
| + |P + + |
---+-----------------------------------------------------------------+---
| A | B | C | D | E | F | G | H | I | J | K |
Location Description
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
B1 Starting location from Circuits of Time if you hold UP
F1 Starting location from Circuits of Time if you do nothing
J1/K1 Starting location from Circuits of Time if you hold DOWN
A1 Bait. Find it on the first tree above the intersection.
A1-A2 Horse track.
A2 Historical dude. Otherwise take the other door to warp next to
Miss Fifi's house.
A4 Top door contains historical dude if clue says ___ is at Lord's
castle. Otherwise take the other door inside to warp next to Miss
Fifi's house.
A4 Bottom door is peasant babe's house.
B3 Textbook. Find it in a small fence enclosure containing rocks.
B4 Bait. Find it left of the Knight's house at the center of where 3
fences intersect.
C1 Pudding. Find it in a small fence enclosure containing rocks.
C3 Ted's house.
D1 Miss Fifi's house.
D4 Knight's house.
D4/E4 Skeleton key. Find it on a lone fence just to the right of the
Knight's house.
F2 Jail.
F3 Town crier's house.
F4 Firecrackers. Find it in the middle of an fence enclosure aka
corral containing 2 rocks and a bush on the corral's south side.
H1 Jester's Bar and Grill Bartender.
H4 Four rocks. Find pudding on the left rock that has 2 smaller
pebbles below it.
I1 Historical dude. Otherwise take the other door inside to warp
next to the Knight's house.
I4/J4 Historical dude if clue says ___ in village. Otherwise take the
other door inside to warp next to Knight's house.
J1 Bait. Find it on the first fence you see just to the left of the
intersection.
J1-4/K1-4 Canoe and river with 2 textbooks.
J4/K4 Bait. Find it on the northmost rock on the left just below the
intersection.
Western World
-------------
| A | B | C | D | E | F | G | H | I | J | K |
---+-----------------------------------------------------------------+---
| + |F| |_*|B|_*| |___| + |___||_*_| + |
|....... = = = * |
|.|_| . B |
4 |. _ . _ C | 4
|.|_| . | * ......... |
|.|_| . |_| . . |
|.|_| . . _ . |
___|.|_| . .| | . |___
|. _ . .|_| . |
|.|_| . _ . . |
|. _ . | * . . |
3 |.|_| . |_| . _ . | 3
|.|_| . .| | . |
|.|_| . __ __ .|_| . |
|....... |_*| |_*| . _ . |
---| + = * + = + .|_| . |---
|B .|_| . |
| _ .|_| . |
|....... | * . . |
2 |. _ . |_| . . | 2
|. |F|. . _ . |
|. - . _ .| | . |
___|. . |_| .|_| . |___
|. . |_| . . |
|. . _ . . |
|. . | * . . |
1 |. . |_| . . | 1
|....... ......... |
| __ _ |
| |__||*| B |
| + = P + + |
---+-----------------------------------------------------------------+---
| A | B | C | D | E | F | G | H | I | J | K |
Location Description
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
A1 Starting location from Circuits of Time if you hold DOWN
D1/E1 Starting location from Circuits of Time if you do nothing
J1/K1 Starting location from Circuits of Time if you hold UP
A1-A2 Horse track.
A2 Bait. Find it in front of a teepee beyond the first horse ride on
the west side and near the crossroads.
A3-4/B3-4 Horse track.
B1 Pudding. Find in a corral.
B1/C1 Mexican's house.
B3/C3 Cowboy's house.
B4 Firecrackers. Find it in a corral.
B4/C4 Historical dude Otherwise take the door to warp near Card Dealer's
house.
C2/C3 3 threes (3 rocks, 3 bushes, 3 campfires). Find textbooks in the
center of them.
C4 Bait. Find it in the alley between the jail and the Historical
dude's house. Easiest way to find is to get caught by CJD and
then go left after escaping jail.
C4/D4 Jail.
D1 Bait. Find it just north of the crossroads. You'll see 2 rocks
above and below 2 tree stumps. Bait is just above the tree
stumps.
D1 Historical dude. Otherwise take the door to warp near NW corner.
D2 Bill's house.
F3/G3 Historical dude. Otherwise take the door to warp near Card
Dealer's house.
G3 Historical dude. House is facing east. Otherwise take the door
to warp near NW corner.
G4 Bait. Find it in front of a teepee just south of the crossroads.
Look for a teepee with 2 rocks to the north and a tree stump in
front.
G4 Marshal's house.
I4 Trader Dan's house.
J1-4/K1-4 Horse track.
J4 Four rocks. Find pudding on the rock between the 2 long vertical
rock columns.
J4 Cassette tapes. Find them in front of a teepee just above the
horse track.
Colonial World
--------------
| A | B | C | D | E | F | G | H | I | J | K |
---+-----------------------------------------------------------------+---
| + |_*_|||_| C |___| |_*_| + |
| _ B _______ |
|| * | | |
4 ||_| | | | 4
| | | |
| | | |
| | | |
___| | | |___
| B | | |
| | | |
| + + | | |
3 | _ ......... | | | 3
| | * .|_| . | | |
| |_| .|_| . | | |
| |_| .|_| . | T | |
---| _ .|_| . | | |---
| |_* .|_| . | | |
| | | . . |_______| |
| |_* ......... ___ |
2 | F |___| | 2
| + + + |
| _ _______ * B |
___||_| | | _ |___
| _ | S | | * |
|| * | | |_| |
||_| | | |
1 | | | | 1
| _ __ __ | T | ___ |
| |_||_*||_*| |_______| |_* | |
| _ B |
| + |P + + |
---+-----------------------------------------------------------------+---
| A | B | C | D | E | F | G | H | I | J | K |
Location Description
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
C3 Starting location from Circuits of Time if you do nothing
H2 Starting location from Circuits of Time if you hold UP
I4 Starting location from Circuits of Time if you hold DOWN
A1 Historical dude. Otherwise take door to warp to four rocks.
A2 Jail.
A2 Metalsmith's son's house.
A3 Historical dude. Brick house. Otherwise take door to warp to the
four rocks.
A4 Tax Collector's house.
A4/B4 Bait. Find it on a south bush just east of the NW intersection.
B1 Green Minuteman's house.
B1/C1 Pudding. Find it in a corral.
B3 Bait. Find it on a fence just east of the intersection.
B4/C4 Miss Fifi's house.
C1 Trader Dan's house.
D4 Cassette tapes. Just above the double fence.
E1 Bait. Find it on a fence just west of the intersection.
E2 Firecrackers. Find it on a left fence north of the intersection.
EFG1-2 River with textbook and skeleton key.
EFG2-3 Horse track.
F4/G4 Historical dude. Otherwise take door to warp next to Green
Minuteman's house.
H1 Historical dude. Otherwise take door to warp next to Green
Minuteman's house.
H2 Four rocks. Find pudding in the rock between the 2 long vertical
rock columns.
J1/K1 Ted's house.
J2 Bait. Find it between a rock and a bush at the bottom of the
screen just left of the intersection.
J2-4/K2-4 River with a textbook.
Modern World
------------
| A | B | C | D | E | F | G | H | I | J | K |
---+-----------------------------------------------------------------+---
| + |__| |__| + |__| |_*| + |
| _ _ B |
|| * | * _______ |
4 ||_| _ |_| | || 4
||_| |F| _ | T ||
||_| |_| | ||
|| * _ | ||
___||_| __ __ _ ___ | * | ||___
| |__| |_*| |_| |_*_| |_| | S ||
| B | ||
| + + + | ||
3 | _____ _ _ | || 3
|| | | * | | | ||
|| | |_| |_| | ||
|| | _ _ | C ||
---|| | |_| | | | ||---
|| | _ |_| _ | S ||
|| | | * |F| |_______||
|| | |_| __ |
2 || | |__| | 2
|| | + + * + |
|| | _ _ |
___|| S | | | | * |___
|| | |_| |_| |
|| | _ |
|| | | | |
1 || T | |_| | 1
|| | B |
||_____| __ __ __ |
| |__||__| C P |_*| |
| + B + + |
---+-----------------------------------------------------------------+---
| A | B | C | D | E | F | G | H | I | J | K |
Location Description
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
A3 Starting location from Circuits of Time if you do nothing
I1/J1 Starting location from Circuits of Time if you hold DOWN
J4 Starting location from Circuits of Time if you hold UP
A1-3/B1-3 River with textbook and skeleton key.
A3/B3 Bait. Find it on a fence next to the left house.
A4 Jail.
A4 US Marine Recruiter's office.
A4/B4 Firecracker. Find it in a corral.
B3/C3 Historical dude. Otherwise take the door to warp to the four
rocks.
C1 Bait. Find it on a rock near the right house.
D2 Historical dude. Otherwise take the door to warp to B1
D3 Miss Fifi's house.
E1 Cassette tapes. Find it on a fence east of the intersection.
E3 Trader Dan's house.
F1 Historical dude. Otherwise take the door to warp to the four
rocks.
F1 Pudding. Find it above the double fence.
G3/G4 Historical dude. Otherwise take the door to warp to B1
G4 Gangster's house.
H2 Firecracker. Find it in a corral.
I2 Four rocks. Find pudding on the left rock that has 2 smaller
pebbles below it.
I4 Bait. Find it on a rock near the left house.
J1-2/K1-2 Ted's house.
J2-4/K2-4 River with 2 skeleton keys, cassette tape, and textbook.
J4 Big Al's Speakeasy.
K1 Bait. Find it on a tree on the left side just north of the SW
intersection.
Medieval World 2
----------------
| A | B | C | D | E | F | G | H | I | J | K |
---+-----------------------------------------------------------------+---
| + ||_||_||*| S| + |__||__||_*| + |
| __ --B | * |
|| | | | __ B |
4 || * | | | _ _______ | 4
|| | | | |F| | | |
|| | | | | | |
||__* | | | | |
___| | | | | |___
| __ _ | | | | |
|| | |T| |__* | | |
|| | | T | |
3 ||__| | | | 3
| __ __ __ | | |
| | || || | | | |
| |__||*_||__| | | |
---| + + | T | |---
| _ | | |
|| | | | |
|| * | | |
2 ||_| __ | | | 2
|...... | | | | |
|. . | | | | |
___|. . | * | | |___
|. . | | | | |
|. . |__| | | |
|. . |_______| |
1 |...... __ __ __ | 1
| | || || | _________ |
| B |__||__||_*| | | |
| _ |*_______*| B |
| + |P + + |
---+-----------------------------------------------------------------+---
| A | B | C | D | E | F | G | H | I | J | K |
Location Description
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
B1 Starting location from Circuits of Time if you hold UP
F1 Starting location from Circuits of Time if you do nothing
J1/K1 Starting location from Circuits of Time if you hold DOWN
A1 Bait. Find it on the first tree above the intersection.
A1-A2 Horse track.
A2 Historical dude. Otherwise take the other door to warp next to
Miss Fifi's house.
A4 Top door contains historical dude if clue says ___ is at Lord's
castle. Otherwise take the other door inside to warp next to Miss
Fifi's house.
A4 Bottom door is peasant babe's house.
B3 Textbook. Find it in a small fence enclosure containing rocks.
B4 Bait. Find it left of the Knight's house at the center of where 3
fences intersect.
C1 Pudding. Find it in a small fence enclosure containing rocks.
C3 Ted's house.
D1 Miss Fifi's house.
D4 Knight's house.
D4/E4 Skeleton key. Find it on a lone fence just to the right of the
Knight's house.
F2 Jail.
F3 Town crier's house.
F4 Firecrackers. Find it in the middle of an fence enclosure aka
corral containing 2 rocks and a bush on the corral's south side.
H1 Jester's Bar and Grill Bartender.
H4 Four rocks. Find pudding on the left rock that has 2 smaller
pebbles below it.
I1 Historical dude. Otherwise take the other door inside to warp
next to the Knight's house.
I4/J4 Historical dude if clue says ___ in village. Otherwise take the
other door inside to warp next to Knight's house.
J1 Bait. Find it on the first fence you see just to the left of the
intersection.
J1-4/K1-4 Canoe and river with 2 textbooks
J4/K4 Bait. Find it on the northmost rock on the left just below the
intersection.
Ancient World
-------------
| A | B | C | D | E | F | G | H | I | J | K |
---+-----------------------------------------------------------------+---
| + |__*__||__*__| + |_______| + |
| _ * |
| |P B |
4 | _ _ | 4
| _ |P | | |
|| * |_| |
||_| _ | | |
___| | * |_| |___
| |_| _ _ |
| _ |T| | | |
| _ | * |_| |
3 ||_| |_| | | | 3
| _ |_| |
||_| B ___ |
| _ S |_*_| B |
---||_| + + |---
| _ _ _ |
||_| |_| | | |
| _ |_| |_| |
2 ||_| |_| | | | 2
| _ |_| |_| |
||_| _ _ _ |
___| _ | * |F| | | |___
||_| |_| |_* |
| _ |_| |
||_| | * |
1 | _ |_| | 1
||_| _________ ________ |
| B|____*____| |____*___| |
| _ |
| + |C + + |
---+-----------------------------------------------------------------+---
| A | B | C | D | E | F | G | H | I | J | K |
Location Description
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
A4 Starting location from Circuits of Time if you do nothing
F1 Starting location from Circuits of Time if you hold UP
J4 Starting location from Circuits of Time if you hold DOWN
A4 Historical dude. Otherwise take door to warp to Oracle's house.
A4/B4 Pudding. Find it in a corral.
B1 Bait. Find it on a tree west of the Oracle's.
B1/C1/D1 Oracle of Delphi's house.
B4/C4 Army Recruiter's office.
C1 Cassette tapes. Find it in a corral.
C4/D4 Historical dude. Otherwise take door to warp near jail.
E1-2/F1-2 Historical dude. Otherwise take door to warp to Oracle's house.
E3 Bait. Find it on a tree stump south of the jail.
E3 Egyptian Musician's house.
E3-4/F3-4 Jail.
E4 Pudding. Find it in a corral.
F2 Firecracker. Find it in a corral.
F3 Textbook. Find it in a corral.
G1/H1/I1 Gladiator's house.
G3 Skeleton key. Find it on a tree in a rock circle.
G4 Four rocks. Find firecrackers on the rock between the two long
vertical rock columns.
I3 Trader Dan's house.
J1 Bill's house.
J1-2 Historical dude. Otherwise take door to warp to Oracle's.
J3 Bait. Find it on a bush east of Trader Dan's.
K4 Bait. Find it on a rock near the NE corner.
=============================================================================
VIII. WALKTHROUGH
=============================================================================
**Note all maps below have been rotated 45 degrees counterclockwise from the
game's perspective.
Prologue
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
You've just embarked on a quest to save history's most important people. If
you follow everything that I state, you will most surely (and easily)
succeed. Being a full walkthrough, there will be spoilers so use/read as
much/little as you need. I will guide the player to each of the 4 baits in
each level but nothing else unless it is along the way of each bait. Refer
to the map for the complete locations of all items/locations/people.
I begin at the game's title screen. Press START to start the game. You can
press START to skip the intro and go straight to the phone book screen but
you're better off watching the intro since it tells you some vital clues on
completing the game.
"Once upon a time somewhere along the temporal continuum" we find Ted
Theodore Logan. He'll land via phone booth and walk to Rufus. We learn that
some time-space rebels have put some famous people into the wrong time
periods. It's up to you and Bill to save the day. Rufus first instructs you
to check the historical telephone directory aka the phone book to see which
person out of 16 possible people has his/her phone number changed. You'll
then travel to that person's world and get them back to their home world.
Rufus gives you 15 coins to use on your adventure and tips you in on how to
save money by taking a shortcut through time. He also lets you know to ask
the locals for help, but also to make sure that you don't make them mad.
Then Ted is off to save the day.
"Meanwhile...elsewhere along the temporal continuum" we join Bill S. Preston,
Esquire. Bill also lands via phone booth and walks to Rufus. Rufus advises
our hero that he'll need a special item to lure the historical dudes back to
their correct times. Bill then leaves to help Ted save the day.
You'll now see a phone book with the first entry being Cleopatra at 555-9509.
Scroll right by pressing RIGHT to flip through the pages of the phone book.
You'll encounter the various historical dudes you can rescue. Keep your eyes
peeled for a RED phone number flashing below the blue one. Keep scrolling
right until you reach the rightmost page which is Rufus and the password for
the current level. Obviously, level 1 has no password. If you still haven't
come across a red phone number, scroll back left (press LEFT) until you find
one. You'll find one eventually. The game likes to make you scroll through
all 16 names before making the red phone number appear.
****************************************************************************
*****************************************************************************
*****************************************************************************
Please note that the person with the flashing red phone number is RANDOMLY
selected each time you play and on each level. Just because you had to
rescue Elvis in the first level on each of the 4 times you played does not
guarantee that you will have to rescue him the next time you play.
Also, the 12 worlds are in different orders each time you play. You will
play 6 levels, of which levels 1 and 2 require you to rescue 1 historical
dude. Levels 3 and 4 require you to rescue 2 historical dudes. Levels 5 and
6 require you to rescue 3 historical dudes.
*****************************************************************************
*****************************************************************************
*****************************************************************************
When you've found the red flashing phone number (should be 555-6842), press
SELECT to access the phone numpad. Dial the red flashing number that you
found. Press A to enter the Circuits of Time. You'll see a screen with some
pipes zigzagging around, some green circles with numbers inside, a number in
the upper right corner, a red circle that you can control with the
directional pad, and last but not least, the phone booth itself. The upper
right number is the number of coins you have left to complete the call. The
numbers in the circles are the numbers that make up the red flashing phone
number that you just dialed. The goal here is to shoot the phone booth to
the right until you reach the last digit in the phone number. There are 2
ways to do this. The first way is to wait and let the game shoot the booth
around each number. This is guaranteed for the early levels but each number
will cost you 2 coins so you'll end up with 0 coins at the end. The second
and preferred method is to take a shortcut like Rufus suggested. This is
done by prematurely shooting the phone booth out of the number it's currently
in. This is done by pressing A while the phone booth is spinning. It will
fly out in the direction that the yellow part of the booth is facing. You
only have a limited time at each number to do this so do it fast. As the
booth is flying around bouncing off walls, you can use your red circle to try
to catch the booth. Unlike the green circles, the booth will not fly out of
the red circle until you press A. While you're shooting around, you may have
noticed some green circles with white skulls inside them. These are
penalties. They will cost you 1 coin and they will ricochet the booth in a
random, usually useless, direction. Try your best to avoid these if
possible. Lastly, in the later levels, you'll encounter pink skulls inside
the circles. I'll explain more about them later.
Anyway, get to the last number. As you wait for the booth to shoot out, you
have 3 choices of where you want to start off in the level. Since you start
off in Medieval World (555-6842), you can begin the level near the horse and
one of the baits by pressing and then holding DOWN. You can begin near the
canoe and another bait by pressing and then holding UP. Or you can begin
near the jail by doing nothing. You'll find the four baits the fastest by
starting near the canoe so press and hold UP. You'll now begin in Medieval
World.
Medieval World @ 555-6842
-------------------------
Hold UP to start on the southwest near canoe (bait #1)
Hold DOWN to start on the southeast near horse (bait #3)
Default start is on the south middle near the jail
Ok, the adventure begins. You'll be confused at what to do. The goal is
simple: Locate the correct bait of 4 possible baits and then locate the
historical dude whose name had the red phone number that you dialed. After
locating the person, you just give him/her the correct bait to win that
level. Be warned that the baits are HARD TO FIND. There is no way to know
that they are there except to listen to the local townsfolk.
There will be people either standing still, walking around, or walking around
with their arms extended out. The first type are what I call helpful dudes
(HD). They will offer you a tip or give you one of the following: pudding,
firecrackers, highly dangerous textbooks, cassette tapes, shiny coins, or
skeleton keys. The second type are the moving guys (no arms extended) whom I
call toll dudes (TD). They will charge you 1 coin if you touch them or if
they touch you. They usually aren't too bad but don't touch them if you have
no coins or you'll go straight to jail. The final type are the people who
chase after you with their arms extended. I call these people crazed jailer
dudes (CJD). These people will come after you. Don't touch them at any
cost. I repeat, DO NOT TOUCH THEM. If you do, you will land in jail. The
best way to avoid CJD is to jump in areas that you land on your butt in or to
use one of 4 possible "good stuffs" (see items section for more details) to
avoid them.
At this point, I will assume that you have read the sections on controls,
gameplay, and items. If not, please read them now because I will not spend
any more time explaining rules and such in the walkthrough with some
exceptions.
Now that you're acquainted with the rules of the game, let's get started. I
will assume that you took the canoe route in the Circuits of Time. Go south
until you reach an intersection that looks like this.
Go west and you will see a lone fence to the north shortly afterwards. Jump
off the path that you are on towards the fence. You will land on your butt
so don't worry if that happens. Keep jumping until you reach the fence.
You'll find the first bait. Now go east back to the intersection. Then go
north until you reach a river and a canoe. Jump on the canoe. Now navigate
the river carefully. Touch the bubbles in the water to grab highly dangerous
textbooks. There are 2 such bubbles in the river. If you make to the end
without hitting any rocks, you will be rewarded with some coins.
Now go north. You will pass by a rock to your right. Then you should see 3
rocks to your left. Of the 3, only two may be reached by you since the other
rock is past the 2 bushes. Jump on the left rock that is the northmost of
the 2 left rocks. You'll find the second bait.
Figure 2
R - rock
__| |_
bait found here -->R | __ |
___| | | |
| |__| |
| |
R |___ __ |
| | | |
| |R | |
river is below
Now go north until you reach the intersection. You're now in the NE corner
of the world. Go west until you reach 3 houses. Check the rightmost house
to see if the historical dude is there. If not, then check the leftmost
house. In front of the house will be rocks that form a figure 4. This is
four rocks that the clues refer to. Touch the 2 pebble rock that is between
the line of 4 and 5 rocks. You'll get pudding. If you continue further west
until you reach an intersection and then go south from there, you'll
eventually find a corral with firecrackers inside of it. You'll also find a
building with the town crier inside. It's optional to get it so just skip
it. Instead, go back to the right house to the right of the four rocks. Go
inside and take the other door. Now you'll be warped near the NW corner of
the map. To the right is the Knight's house. You can talk with him but go
left instead and you'll see 3 fences intersecting. There is a lone fence in
the middle of the intersection. Jump on it and you'll find the third bait.
Figure 3
F - fence
f | |
f |____|
fff f<-- bait is there
f
f
f
Now go left until you reach an intersection. Then go south until you find a
building to your left. That is the Lord's castle. Go into the first door
that you see. A historical dude may be inside. If they are not, then take
the other door to warp close to the SW corner of the world. There is a
corral near you. Jump in it to grab some pudding. Then go left until you
reach the intersection. You'll now be in the SW corner of the world. Go
north until you see a tree to your left. Jump on it and you'll find the
fourth and final bait.
Figure 4
F - fence
T - tree
| _______
F| |_______
| _ ___
bait is here -->T| |_| |___
| _____ |
| |_ | |
|_ |___| |
|_ ___|
| |
Now you should go north and you'll find a horse. Ride it and if you reach
the end of the horse track, you'll get some coins. Keep going north until
you get back to the Lord's castle. Look inside for the historical dude. If
they aren't inside then, go east until you reach the 3 houses near the NE
corner. Search the rightmost house for the historical dude. If no one is
there, then take the door to warp to the NW. Go west to the intersection.
Then go south until you see a red house to the left (it's just south of the
next intersection you come across). If no one is in the house then take the
door to warp near Miss Fifi's house. Go east past the next intersection.
Keep going east until you find a building. The first door that you see is
the Jester's Bar and Grill. Skip that and go inside the next door on the
building's right side. The historical dude should be inside. If not, then
you can go around and search the 4 different houses where the historical dude
is. Refer to the map for more details.
Give the historical dude the proper bait once you've located them. Don't
give them the wrong bait or you'll land in jail. Now blast through the
Circuits of Time and you're done with Medieval World.
Western World @ 555-1834
------------------------
Hold UP to start on the southeast near long horse track
Hold DOWN to start on the southwest near short horse track (bait #2)
Default start is on the south middle near the historical dude house (bait #1)
Scroll all the way to the right to get the password for the next level. Then
look for the next flashing red phone number. Then enter the phone number
(should be 555-1834) to enter the Circuits of Time. Finish the call by
holding DOWN to start in the SW near a horse track. Hold UP to start on the
SE near a longer horse track. Or do nothing and start at the default
position in the south middle. Don't push anything so we can start in the
south middle. That is the fastest way to get the baits.
To your north is a house with a historical dude but since you don't have any
bait, it's pointless to go there. Instead, go south a few steps and you
should see 2 tree stumps and 2 rocks to your left. Jump on the closest tree
stump and you'll find the first bait.
Figure 1
R - rock
T - tree stump
| _ ____
| |_| |___
| _____ |
R | |_ | |
_TT|_ |___| |
/| |_ ___|
/ R | |
/
bait is there (on right tree stump)
Now go south until you reach an intersection. Then go west. You'll find a
house with a Mexican with whom you can inquire info about. Outside the
Mexican's home is a corral with 2 rocks in the center. Jump on the 2 rocks
to find pudding. Now go west until you reach the next intersection. You'll
be at the SW corner. Now go north and you'll find a horse. Ride it to the
end of the horse track. You'll get coins if you make it all the way through.
Otherwise, just walk to the end. You'll know it's the end because there will
be 8 tree stumps forming a blockcade. There's also a teepee above the
blockcade. Jump on the teepee and you'll find the second bait.
Figure 2
T - teepee
___| |
|___ |
___| |____
bait is here -->T|_ |
_| |
|__________|
Now the next bait is far away. The quickest and easiest way to get there is
to let yourself get caught by a CJD. Get out of jail and then go left. You
will see an alleyway between the jail and the building to its left. The
third bait is located in that alleyway.
Figure 3
. - bait
+ - horse fence post
_______ _______
| house | | jail |
|_______|. |_______|
++ \
\
\
bait is in the space between the house and jail
Now go left and check the house to see if the historical dude is there. If
not, then go east until you reach an intersection. Now go south. You will
soon come across a teepee with 2 rocks and a tree stump above it. Jump in
front of the teepee to find the final bait.
Figure 4
. - bait
R - rock
S - tree stump
T - teepee
___
R S _R_| _
T .|___ |
/ ___| |__
/ |_
/ ___|
/
bait is to the right of the teepee
Now you'll need to find the historical dude. You've probably heard clues to
their location. There are 4 locations where the historical dude may be.
Refer to maps for more details. Location 1 is the house left of the jail in
the NW corner. Location 2 is south of the Marshal's office near the north
middle. Find it by going to the 2nd house south of the first intersection
you come across by going east from the jail. Location 3 is in the middle of
the world. You can find that place by continuing south from location 2 until
you reach an intersection and then going west. The final location is the
house that I mentioned was north of your starting point in the very
beginning. It is located in the south middle, just north of the first bait.
Find the dude and give them the proper bait or you'll go to jail. Then
travel through the Circuits of Time again. Complete the call and you'll
finish Western World.
Colonial World @ 555-1764
-------------------------
Hold UP to start on the lower southeast near the four rocks (bait #3)
Hold DOWN to start on the northeast corner
Default start is on the upper nouthwest (bait #2)
Enter the Circuits of Time. You'll want to hold DOWN to start in the NE
corner. Go west. You'll pass a house. It's one of 4 where the historical
dude may be. Since you have no bait, continue west. Eventually, you'll
reach a double fence. Jump over it and to the left will be a second double
fence. Go to the north of the double fence and you'll find cassette tapes.
Continue going west. You'll pass Miss Fifi's house. After passing Miss
Fifi's house, start to look at the bottom of the screen for a bush. It's the
first bush at the bottom of the screen to the NW intersection's right. Jump
on it to find the first bait.
Figure 1
B - bush
R - rock
_
| |R _
___| |___| |__
_| _ _ ____
___| | |_| |
R |_____|
B<-- bait is here
Now go to the NW intersection. Go south and you'll soon see the Tax
Collector's house to your left. Continue south until you reach the next
intersection. Go east and you'll see a fence shortly afterwards. Jump on it
to find the second bait.
Figure 2
+ - fence
B - bush
R - rock
BRR
bait is here -->++ ___
| |R | _
___| |___| |_
| _ _ ___
| | | |_| |
|_____|
B
Go east until you reach an intersection. Then go south until you reach the
next intersection. You may have noticed a fence on the left side just above
the intersection you just arrived at. Jump on it to find firecrackers. Now
from the intersection that you just arrived at, go east. You'll pass four
rocks. Find pudding on the rock between the 2 long columns of rocks.
Continue east until you reach the point just before the next intersection.
Look near the bottom of the screen. You should see a bush and a rock. Jump
in the space between the two to find the third bait.
Figure 3
. - bait
+ - fence
B - bush
R - rock
R
+
|
|___ _____
_ | | _
| | |_| |_|
| |_________
| B.R
\
\
bait is here
Now go east to the intersection. Then go south. You'll pass a house on your
left which is Ted's house. Go south until you reach another intersection.
You'll now be in the SE corner. Go west and you'll pass a house that may
have a historical dude inside. Continue west to the next intersection. Then
go west. You will see a fence to your north. Jump on it to find the last
bait.
Figure 4
+ - fence
B - bush
R - rock
R B
+<-- bait is here
|
|___ _____
_ | | _ |__
| | |_| |_| __
| |_________|
B R
Now you'll need to find the historical dude. There are 4 possible locations.
Refer to maps for more details. Location 1 is above the jail. It is the
brick house that clues refer to. Location 2 is west of the NE corner.
Location 3 is just north of the SW corner. Location 4 is west of the SE
corner. Give the person the proper bait once you've found them. Then
complete the call through the Circuits of Time and you're done with Colonial
World.
Modern World @ 555-1927
-----------------------
Hold UP to start near northeast corner (bait #1)
Hold DOWN to start southeast corner (bait #4)
Default start is in the middle west (bait #2)
Finish the call by holding UP to start in the NE corner, DOWN to start in the
SE corner, or do nothing to start in the middle west. The fastest way to get
all 4 baits is to start in the NE corner, so hold UP. Go west and you'll
pass by the Gangster's house. There will be a rock to the left of the next
house that you see. Jump on it to find the first bait.
Figure 1
f - fence
R - rock
f bait is there
f /
_ / ______
| | R | ___
__| |___| |___|
__ _ _____
| |_| | _|
|_____| |
|_
Now get yourself caught by a CJD. Get out of jail and go south until you
reach an intersection. Go east and jump on the first fence that you see. It
should be next to a house. You'll find the second bait.
Figure 2
B - bush
f - fence
R - rock
f
bait is here -->ff
_ _____
| |R | ___
___| |___| |___|
_| _ _ _____
___| | |_| | _|
|_____| B|
Now go east until you reach the next intersection. Then go south until you
find the third house. Go inside to find a historical dude if you have the
proper bait. Take the door to warp to the SW corner. Go east and you will
see a house with a rock in front of the door. Jump on the rock to find the
third bait.
Figure 3
f - fence
R - rock
bait is here
/
f R _____
|___________| _
___ _ _ |_|
| _| |_| | | ___
| | _____| | |___|
| | |_______| ___
| |___________|
Now go east until you reach the next intersection. You will be in the SE
corner. Go north and you'll soon see a tree to your left. Jump on it to
find the last bait.
Figure 4
R - rock
T - tree
____
| |____
R| _ ___
| |_| |___
bait is here -->T| _____ |
| |_ | |
|_ |___| |
|_ ___|
| |
| |
Now you'll need to locate the historical dude. There are 4 locations to
search. The first is in the middle north. You can find it by going south
from the intersection between the NW and NE intersections. The second is
found next to the second bait. The third one we visited on our way to the
third bait. The last location is the house that you passed by on the way to
the last bait. Give the person the proper bait or you'll go to jail. Enter
the Circuits of Time. Complete the call and you're done with Modern World.
Medieval World 2 @ 555-7391
---------------------------
Hold UP to start on the southwest near canoe (bait #1)
Hold DOWN to start on the southeast near horse (bait #3)
Default start is on the south middle near the jail
Ok, you're in for a real treat. This world is 100% identical to Medieval
World 1 so everything is easy to find. The only difference is that the
people sprites have changed. For example, you'll now see knights in full
armor as opposed to ones with the chain coifs equipped. You'll see green
peasants instead of the red/orange ones. Even the people like Miss Fifi and
the Town Crier have new sprites. Their messages remain the same. The only
other difference other than visual is the fact that you're probably far in
the game by now so the CJD's will be more numerous and faster moving.
Well, let's get started. I will assume that you took the canoe route in the
Circuits of Time. Go south until you reach an intersection that looks like
this.
Go west and you will see a lone fence to the north shortly afterwards. Jump
off the path that you are on towards the fence. You will land on your butt
so don't worry if that happens. Keep jumping until you reach the fence.
You'll find the first bait. Now go east back to the intersection. Then go
north until you reach a river and a canoe. Jump on the canoe. Now navigate
the river carefully. Touch the bubbles in the water to grab highly dangerous
textbooks. There are 2 such bubbles in the river. If you make to the end
without hitting any rocks, you will be rewarded with some coins.
Now go north. You will pass by a rock to your right. Then you should see 3
rocks to your left. Of the 3, only two may be reached by you since the other
rock is past the 2 bushes. Jump on the left rock that is the northmost of
the 2 left rocks. You'll find the second bait.
Figure 2
R - rock
__| |_
bait found here -->R | __ |
___| | | |
| |__| |
| |
R |___ __ |
| | | |
| |R | |
river is below
Now go north until you reach the intersection. You're now in the NE corner
of the world. Go west until you reach 3 houses. Check the rightmost house
to see if the historical dude is there. If not, then check the leftmost
house. In front of the house will be rocks that form a figure 4. This is
four rocks that the clues refer to. Touch the 2 pebble rock that is between
the line of 4 and 5 rocks. You'll get pudding. If you continue further west
until you reach an intersection and then go south from there, you'll
eventually find a corral with firecrackers inside of it. You'll also find a
building with the town crier inside. It's optional to get it so just skip
it. Instead, go back to the right house to the right of the four rocks. Go
inside and take the other door. Now you'll be warped near the NW corner of
the map. To the right is the Knight's house. You can talk with him but go
left instead and you'll see 3 fences intersecting. There is a lone fence in
the middle of the intersection. Jump on it and you'll find the third bait.
Figure 3
F - fence
f | |
f |____|
fff f<-- bait is there
f
f
f
Now go left until you reach an intersection. Then go south until you find a
building to your left. That is the Lord's castle. Go into the first door
that you see. A historical dude may be inside. If they are not, then take
the other door to warp close to the SW corner of the world. There is a
corral near you. Jump in it to grab some pudding. Then go left until you
reach the intersection. You'll now be in the SW corner of the world. Go
north until you see a tree to your left. Jump on it and you'll find the
fourth and final bait.
Figure 4
F - fence
T - tree
| _______
F| |_______
| _ ___
bait is here -->T| |_| |___
| _____ |
| |_ | |
|_ |___| |
|_ ___|
| |
Now you should go north and you'll find a horse. Ride it and if you reach
the end of the horse track, you'll get some coins. Keep going north until
you get back to the Lord's castle. Look inside for the historical dude. If
they aren't inside then, go east until you reach the 3 houses near the NE
corner. Search the rightmost house for the historical dude. If no one is
there, then take the door to warp to the NW. Go west to the intersection.
Then go south until you see a red house to the left (it's just south of the
next intersection you come across). If no one is in the house then take the
door to warp near Miss Fifi's house. Go east past the next intersection.
Keep going east until you find a building. The first door that you see is
the Jester's Bar and Grill. Skip that and go inside the next door on the
building's right side. The historical dude should be inside. If not, then
you can go around and search the 4 different houses where the historical dude
is. Refer to the map for more details.
Give the historical dude the proper bait once you've located them. Don't
give them the wrong bait or you'll land in jail. Now blast through the
Circuits of Time and you're done with Medieval World 2.
Ancient World @ 555-0592
------------------------
Hold UP to start in the middle south
Hold DOWN to start just left of the northeast corner (bait #1)
Default start is at the northwest corner
Finish the call by holding UP to start in the middle south, DOWN to start
near the NE corner, or do nothing to start at the NW corner. The fastest way
to get all the baits is to start at the NE corner so hold DOWN. Go left to
the NE corner. Then go down and immediately to your left will be a rock.
Jump on it to find the first bait.
Figure 1
B - bush
R - rock
T - tree stump
R | |
TT _| |___
bait is here -->R__| ___ |
B |___ | | |
___| |___| |
Now go south until you reach the next intersection. Go west and you'll see a
bush to the north side. Jump on it and you'll find the second bait.
Figure 2
B - bush
R - rock
R
_____B<-- bait is here
_ |
| | |___ ___
| | _ | | _
| | | | |_| |
|_| | |_____|
______|
Continue west and the building in front of you is Trader Dan's house.
Continue west until you reach the next intersection. Go north and you'll
soon see a some tree stumps to your left. Jump on them to find the third
bait.
Figure 3
. - bait
B - bush
R - rock
T - tree stump
| _ ___
| |_| |___
B | _____ |
R | |_ | |
T.|_ |___| |
/ |_ ___|
/ R | |
bait is there | | R
Now go back south to the intersection. Then go south. You'll pass 4 houses.
The 5th house may contain a historical dude. Go inside and take the door to
warp to the SW, near the Oracle of Delphi's house. Without moving an inch,
go left. You'll see a tree. Jump on it to find the last bait.
Figure 4
c - cactus
B - bush
T - tree
__B_____T<-- bait is here
| ___ |c
| |___| |c
__ |c
__| |c
_______|c
c
You'll now have to locate the historical dude. There are 4 possible
locations. The first location is the one we warped to the Oracle's house
with. It is found by going south from the jail. The second location is
north of the SE corner. The third location is east of the NW corner. The
fourth location is south of the NW corner. Be sure to give the historical
dude the proper bait or you'll go to jail. Then enter the Circuits of Time,
finish the call, and you're done with Ancient World.
Final Words
===========
Obviously, I won't repeat the strategy for the replaying of the same stages.
Remember that the order that you complete the worlds starting at level 3 and
beyond is up to you. Don't enter a world that you know is hard unless you're
ready for it. With that, enjoy the ending when you get it (or just look at
the next section below).
=============================================================================
IX. ENDING
=============================================================================
The ending to the game is rather disappointing. Not only do we not get a
credits roll, we never find out who the rebels were and whether or not they
were defeated. Here are the results of the completion of each level and the
final congratulatory screen.
Level 1 completed - Bill and Ted on stage. Music is terrible.
Level 2 completed - 2 new female band members join. Music improved.
Level 3 completed - Audience is visible. Added music notes towards the
middle of the song.
Level 4 completed - Audience throws balloons and takes photos.
Level 5 completed - Larger Audience. Now they throw beach balloons too.
Level 6 completed - Full capacity audience. Bill and Ted jam on their
guitars.
Ending is directly quoted below this line (that's right, it's 1 screen only!)
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Congratulations
Tricks to Try
-------------
Scare the info out of them
Firecrackers can be used to scare people. However, if you catch someone
while they are running away scared, you will get a clue/item.
Stop the music
The cassette tape will play for a certain length of time. However, you can
prematurely end the music by accessing the telephone pad from the inventory
screen (press UP and A) and then dialing a number. Once you dial a single
digit, the music will stop. This applies to the regular world's music as
well.
Quick way to jail
If you need to get a CJD real quick, you can use a pudding and get in the
person's way.
No one bothers you
It's not really a trick per se, but if you have a lot of cassettes, you can
use them in succession so you won't have anyone to deal with. Be careful not
to touch ANYONE while the cassette is playing or you will go to jail.
Three's the charm
There can only be a max of 3 enemy sprites onscreen so if you can get 3 CJD's
to chase you, no one else will follow you. This applies to non-CJD's too.
Game Genie Codes
----------------
IESVAPIP Bill starts with 5 coins
OOSVAPIO Bill starts with 99 coins
IEKKUTIP Ted starts with 5 coins
OOKKUTIO Ted starts with 99 coins
SZKUPXVK Infinite skeleton keys
SZEKUOSE Infinite shiny coins
OUOOUEOO Infinite "good stuff" items (ie. pudding, firecracker,
textbook, cassette tape)
SXOTTOSE Circuits of Time segments cost only 1 coin
=============================================================================
XII. FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS
=============================================================================
Q: Why do I keep falling down on my butt after I jump?
A: Landing on your butt means that you are jumping on an area that is off of
the regular path. You can only walk on the path when the screen has a
dirt path. When there is no dirt path, only then may you walk on the
grass. Note, most of the baits require you to jump on areas off the
regular path.
Q: I can't find the baits.
A: Try looking at the clues people give you. Also the baits are on very
specific spots. They require you to leap off the regular path and land
on your butt to find them.
Q: I can't find the historical dude.
A: You need to do 2 things. First, you must find the proper bait to make
the historical dude appear. Second, you must locate the person's
location. The historical dude will be in one of the several empty houses
in each world.
Q: What are the empty houses for?
A: The houses are the possible locations where the historical dude can
appear after you've found the correct bait.
Q: I found the historical dude, gave him the proper bait, finished the
Circuits of Time but it gave me a message "Well done but alas... the
future is not yet as it was!" What is going on?
A: The answer is that you're in level 3 or higher. Starting with level 3,
you'll get more than one flashing red phone number to dial. That means
you'll need to save more than 1 historical dude. Levels 3 & 4 require 2
historical dudes to be rescued and levels 5 & 6 require 3 each.
Q: How do I avoid the crazed jailor dudes (CJD)? They keep catching me.
A: You can throw one of your good stuffs to lure them away. Or you can jump
on an area off the regular path. CJD can only walk on paths so if you
jump and land on your butt, they won't be able to get you. This is a
handy trick to use to conserve your good stuffs.
Q: I'm lost and I don't know where anything is. Where do I go?
A: The worlds in the game are huge. Unless you like spending hours
wandering aimlessly, please make detailed maps of the worlds. You don't
need to make a complete map, just the important stuff like bait,
intersections, etc.
Q: I ran out of coins and couldn't complete the call. Help!
A: You'll need to find some locals to give coins to you. You can try riding
the horse or use the canoe to earn some coins. If you're not in a world,
Rufus will automatically give you 15 more coins to use.
Q: Are Medieval World 1 and Medieval World 2 really identical?
A: Yes. I'm guessing that the programmers got lazy or ran out of ideas.
=============================================================================
XII. CREDITS
=============================================================================
Game Genie Code Creators Club
Game Genie codes.
Nintendo Power vol 26, 32.
map of Medieval World, "CJD" terminology, Western World bait locations.
GameFAQs
for putting a FAQ bounty on it which is the sole reason this FAQ exists.
=============================================================================
XIII. DISCLAIMER
=============================================================================
This FAQ is neither affiliated nor endorsed by LJN LTD or Nelson Films, Inc.
It may be distributed FREELY so long as it remains unaltered AND is the
latest version (see above for where to obtain the latest version). It is
intended for PRIVATE USE and may NOT be reproduced for commercial purposes by
mechanical, electronic, or any other means. Do not try to sell it even if no
profit is made off this work. In addition, this FAQ may not be used for
personal gain by submission to game magazines, web sites, etc. Email any
comments, changes, typos, etc. to me at darktoshi@yahoo.com. Make sure that
you are reading the latest version BEFORE you email me.
